Hey all! I just wanted to let you know that I am moving my blog..... my new address is http://www.cheritriplett.com/. Please come visit me there! Leave a comment!
God Bless!!
Friday, September 30, 2011
Sunday, September 25, 2011
My Dream Come True!
When I was in kindergarten or first grade I heard the story of Florence Nightingale. From that day forward I knew what I wanted to be when I grew up....a nurse! I never wavered. It was never a question of which major to pick in college...there was no question, I was born to be a nurse!
Some of my earliest memories of my nursing passion was having a nurse's station for my younger siblings. As my very determined younger sister decided to teach herself how to ride her bike came lots of crashes. So, I saw an opportunity! I smuggled all of the bandages out of the bathroom outside to the front porch and set up shop!
I believe God plants dreams in our hearts. Based on His all surpassing knowledge, He created us and knows us well. Psalms 139:13,16 says, "For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb....... All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be." God planted another dream in my heart that I had forgotten about....
When I was 7 yrs old I remember one of my parents' friends asking me, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" My response, "A Nurse and a Pastor's wife!"As I said before the passion for nursing never changed but the Pastor's wife thing is not something I held tight to accomplishing. To be completely honest so much happened in the eleven years between that question and the day I met my husband that the last thing on Earth that I wanted was to be a Pastor's wife!! God never forgot the plans He had for me. When I met Jason the last thing either of us had planned was a life in ministry! Again God had other plans and I am SO thankful for that! Jason has been in ministry for almost 8 years and I would not trade it for the world!!
God planted another dream in my heart about 10 yrs ago. A dream that would use my gifts and talents as a nurse and my passion for the Love of Christ! I have dreamed about going on a medical mission trip! But, being that we have 4 kids that are so young I always thought that I would have to put that dream on the shelf until my kids were raised. The Dr. I work for goes on an annual mission trip to Haiti. This year the team going was short on nurses. About five weeks ago he invited me to go. I could not believe it! Something I have dreamed about for the past 10 years would now become a reality!
About two weeks ago my passport came in the mail the same day as my mission T-shirt. I remember holding them both in my hands staring down at them and the reality of it all hit me! Anxiety, excitement, joy, fear, and peace all at once! Along with all those emotions thankfulness too! If God had not given me such a supportive, loving, involved husband there is no way I could even consider this trip!
As the time draws near to the trip I am a little overwhelmed! I cannot believe this dream God has place in my heart 10 years ago is coming true! I cannot wait to use the nursing skills God has given me to help the Haitian people physically and share the Love God has given me to help them spiritually. To be an instrument of God! Shine His light! Not to leave out the fact that I am also a little unsure and nervous, not sure what to expect. But, I know this is God's plan for me and He will never leave or forsake me!
The theme for Women of Faith this year is Imagine with the theme verse....
"God can do anything, you know -- far more than you could ever imagine or guess or request in your wildest dreams!" Ephesians 3:20 (the Message)
I know there are other plans and dreams God has for me. I cannot wait to see what He has for me next!!
Some of my earliest memories of my nursing passion was having a nurse's station for my younger siblings. As my very determined younger sister decided to teach herself how to ride her bike came lots of crashes. So, I saw an opportunity! I smuggled all of the bandages out of the bathroom outside to the front porch and set up shop!
I believe God plants dreams in our hearts. Based on His all surpassing knowledge, He created us and knows us well. Psalms 139:13,16 says, "For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb....... All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be." God planted another dream in my heart that I had forgotten about....
When I was 7 yrs old I remember one of my parents' friends asking me, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" My response, "A Nurse and a Pastor's wife!"As I said before the passion for nursing never changed but the Pastor's wife thing is not something I held tight to accomplishing. To be completely honest so much happened in the eleven years between that question and the day I met my husband that the last thing on Earth that I wanted was to be a Pastor's wife!! God never forgot the plans He had for me. When I met Jason the last thing either of us had planned was a life in ministry! Again God had other plans and I am SO thankful for that! Jason has been in ministry for almost 8 years and I would not trade it for the world!!
God planted another dream in my heart about 10 yrs ago. A dream that would use my gifts and talents as a nurse and my passion for the Love of Christ! I have dreamed about going on a medical mission trip! But, being that we have 4 kids that are so young I always thought that I would have to put that dream on the shelf until my kids were raised. The Dr. I work for goes on an annual mission trip to Haiti. This year the team going was short on nurses. About five weeks ago he invited me to go. I could not believe it! Something I have dreamed about for the past 10 years would now become a reality!
About two weeks ago my passport came in the mail the same day as my mission T-shirt. I remember holding them both in my hands staring down at them and the reality of it all hit me! Anxiety, excitement, joy, fear, and peace all at once! Along with all those emotions thankfulness too! If God had not given me such a supportive, loving, involved husband there is no way I could even consider this trip!
As the time draws near to the trip I am a little overwhelmed! I cannot believe this dream God has place in my heart 10 years ago is coming true! I cannot wait to use the nursing skills God has given me to help the Haitian people physically and share the Love God has given me to help them spiritually. To be an instrument of God! Shine His light! Not to leave out the fact that I am also a little unsure and nervous, not sure what to expect. But, I know this is God's plan for me and He will never leave or forsake me!
The theme for Women of Faith this year is Imagine with the theme verse....
"God can do anything, you know -- far more than you could ever imagine or guess or request in your wildest dreams!" Ephesians 3:20 (the Message)
I know there are other plans and dreams God has for me. I cannot wait to see what He has for me next!!
Friday, September 9, 2011
I AM a Mom....and God is God!
One evening last week Hunter and Jakob were hanging out in the kitchen with me as I was making dinner. I had been at work all day so I was enjoying hearing all about how their day had gone and what they had been up to. Hunter (the 6 year old) says, "Hey Mom, can you whistle?" I said, "NO" (don't laugh at me! I just never learned how to whistle!) Hunter comes back at me with, "But Moms know everything!" (see my blog post "Mom's Know EVERYTHING!" posted June 2011) Then, Jakob (the 4 year old) looks at me and says, "Guess you are not really a mom then!"..........WHAT????
I wanted to look at my boys and say "EXCUSE ME" I carried you both for nine months! I have a combined total of 50 hours of labour under my belt! I was either pregnant or nursing from 2001 to 2007!! I birthed you from my loins!! I have been peed on, pooped on, puked on, and had my clothes soaked through from breast milk cause some other baby was crying the next isle over at Wal mart!!! I most certainly AM a MOM!!!
Over the past week I have reflected several times on Jakob's comment. I thought of the times in life we may say to God..."I guess your not really God." You know the times when something really rocks our life and we say...."If there was really a God then this would not happen." Sometimes it is hard to look at all that is wrong in the world and make sense of it all.
I went through a time like that in my life. A time where none of it made sense and I did not see the point in even praying. I could not even say bed time prayers with my kids. I would kneel by their bed and have them say the prayer cause I could not utter a word to God. I could not see where God was in my circumstances and certainly could not understand why He had allowed such things to happen!
I am not the only one....most of us have heard the story of Job from the Bible. Job was a faithful servant of God who lost his children, his home, his wealth, and his health. After enduring such loss and agony he begins to question God....for about 6 straight chapters he asks God, "why me?" And then God answers Job.
God said to Job, "Brace yourself like a man; I will question you and you shall answer me." Then for the next 4 chapters God asks Job questions that remind both Job and us who HE is..."Where were you when I laid the earth's foundation? Who marked off its dimensions? Who shut up the sea behind doors? Have you ever given orders to the morning, or shown the dawn its place? Do you send the lightning bolts on their way? Who can tip the water jars of the heavens when the dust becomes hard and the clods of earth stick together?...."(Job 38)
I, like Job, need to be reminded sometimes of who God is. My prayer is that the next time I face things that may tempt me to say...."If you were really God you wouldn't...." my reply will be that of Job's....after enduring God's questioning him like a man Job replied:
"I know that you can do all things; no plan of yours can be thwarted. You asked, 'Who is this that obscures my counsel without knowledge?' Surely I spoke of things I did not understand, things too wonderful for me to know." Job 42:2-3
I wanted to look at my boys and say "EXCUSE ME" I carried you both for nine months! I have a combined total of 50 hours of labour under my belt! I was either pregnant or nursing from 2001 to 2007!! I birthed you from my loins!! I have been peed on, pooped on, puked on, and had my clothes soaked through from breast milk cause some other baby was crying the next isle over at Wal mart!!! I most certainly AM a MOM!!!
Over the past week I have reflected several times on Jakob's comment. I thought of the times in life we may say to God..."I guess your not really God." You know the times when something really rocks our life and we say...."If there was really a God then this would not happen." Sometimes it is hard to look at all that is wrong in the world and make sense of it all.
I went through a time like that in my life. A time where none of it made sense and I did not see the point in even praying. I could not even say bed time prayers with my kids. I would kneel by their bed and have them say the prayer cause I could not utter a word to God. I could not see where God was in my circumstances and certainly could not understand why He had allowed such things to happen!
I am not the only one....most of us have heard the story of Job from the Bible. Job was a faithful servant of God who lost his children, his home, his wealth, and his health. After enduring such loss and agony he begins to question God....for about 6 straight chapters he asks God, "why me?" And then God answers Job.
God said to Job, "Brace yourself like a man; I will question you and you shall answer me." Then for the next 4 chapters God asks Job questions that remind both Job and us who HE is..."Where were you when I laid the earth's foundation? Who marked off its dimensions? Who shut up the sea behind doors? Have you ever given orders to the morning, or shown the dawn its place? Do you send the lightning bolts on their way? Who can tip the water jars of the heavens when the dust becomes hard and the clods of earth stick together?...."(Job 38)
I, like Job, need to be reminded sometimes of who God is. My prayer is that the next time I face things that may tempt me to say...."If you were really God you wouldn't...." my reply will be that of Job's....after enduring God's questioning him like a man Job replied:
"I know that you can do all things; no plan of yours can be thwarted. You asked, 'Who is this that obscures my counsel without knowledge?' Surely I spoke of things I did not understand, things too wonderful for me to know." Job 42:2-3
Monday, August 29, 2011
You Can Do It!......
One of my fondest memories from childhood was learning to ride my bike! I had gotten the bike for Christmas. I remember waking up and finding, a beautiful shiny bike in shades of pink and grey with the words "Sea Princess" written down the frame accented with pictures of seashells, under the Christmas tree. It was prettier than I had ever imagined! That following spring my dad taught me to ride that bike. I think one of the reasons I treasure that memory is because my dad worked two jobs most of my childhood so there was not a lot of time to do things like that together. He held the back of the banana seat to help steady me and I peddled away. I remember saying something to him and he did not respond. I turned around to see if he was still there....but he wasn't he had let go several feet back and I was peddling on my own! He was there cheering me on, encouraging me that I could do it! (As soon as I realized that he wasn't there I panicked and crashed!)
This weekend some of our friends from out of town came with their three boys for a visit. Most of the weekend the kids played outside riding their bikes around the block over and over.....there was Hunter, following along trying to keep up on his razor scooter....By Sunday evening he was done trying to keep up on the scooter. He set his mind to riding his bike on his own....and that he did! With practice and determination he taught himself to ride his bike! He came in and asked me to come out and watch, I could not help but cheer him on, yelling down the block, "You can do it! You can do it! Awesome!!"
That phrase, "You can do it." reminded me of something Luci Swindoll said at Women of Faith (in Indy). When Luci asked her roommate why she did such big extravagant things, the roommates response was, "No one told me I couldn't do it." I started to think about that.....Have I been told I could not do things? Have I told my children they could not do things?
As a mother I do find myself telling my kids "No, you can't do that." Sometimes it is for valid reasons like having cake for breakfast. But, other times I think I don't even really think about it, I just respond with a "No you can't." I want my kids to dream big, and not be boxed in by a simple phrase. I want to cheer them on and encourage them that they can do it.
But, I also realized that not only do I tell my children that they can't do it, sometimes I tell myself that. I convince myself that I cannot do things that God is calling me to. Many times it is based out of fear.... fear of failure, fear of others opinions, fear of the risk that may need to be taken, fear of the commitment it may take, sometimes it is even out of fear of thinking too much of myself. I have convinced myself for the past year that I could not write the things I know God has asked me to.
I am on a journey of stepping out of the "I can't" box and into true faith. Asking God to help me overcome the fear and do what He has asked of me. As I am maneuvering this journey there is a balance that must be maintained. A balance that reminds me that I CAN do it, but also reminds me that I, ALONE, cannot do it. A balance that is not easy to maintain, but is required. A balance that is found in two verses........
"I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing." John 15:5
- and -
"I can do everything through Him who gives me strength." Philippians 4:13
This weekend some of our friends from out of town came with their three boys for a visit. Most of the weekend the kids played outside riding their bikes around the block over and over.....there was Hunter, following along trying to keep up on his razor scooter....By Sunday evening he was done trying to keep up on the scooter. He set his mind to riding his bike on his own....and that he did! With practice and determination he taught himself to ride his bike! He came in and asked me to come out and watch, I could not help but cheer him on, yelling down the block, "You can do it! You can do it! Awesome!!"
That phrase, "You can do it." reminded me of something Luci Swindoll said at Women of Faith (in Indy). When Luci asked her roommate why she did such big extravagant things, the roommates response was, "No one told me I couldn't do it." I started to think about that.....Have I been told I could not do things? Have I told my children they could not do things?
As a mother I do find myself telling my kids "No, you can't do that." Sometimes it is for valid reasons like having cake for breakfast. But, other times I think I don't even really think about it, I just respond with a "No you can't." I want my kids to dream big, and not be boxed in by a simple phrase. I want to cheer them on and encourage them that they can do it.
But, I also realized that not only do I tell my children that they can't do it, sometimes I tell myself that. I convince myself that I cannot do things that God is calling me to. Many times it is based out of fear.... fear of failure, fear of others opinions, fear of the risk that may need to be taken, fear of the commitment it may take, sometimes it is even out of fear of thinking too much of myself. I have convinced myself for the past year that I could not write the things I know God has asked me to.
I am on a journey of stepping out of the "I can't" box and into true faith. Asking God to help me overcome the fear and do what He has asked of me. As I am maneuvering this journey there is a balance that must be maintained. A balance that reminds me that I CAN do it, but also reminds me that I, ALONE, cannot do it. A balance that is not easy to maintain, but is required. A balance that is found in two verses........
"I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing." John 15:5
- and -
"I can do everything through Him who gives me strength." Philippians 4:13
Monday, August 22, 2011
Happiness comes from a change in Perspective.....
As sure as the sun is going to rise each day....each August the kids go back to school. Which means school supply shopping. I remember as a kid I loved getting new school supplies. It was one of the few times of year that I actually got NEW things! So, each year I try to make sort of a family event out of it. But, as we get more kids in school it gets a little more overwhelming.
I am a procrastinator. Not because I just make a choice to push it off to later, but because I have so much going on that I am always dealing with the emergent. Last week school shopping became the emergent. Monday was my only day off before school started so, I loaded all 4 kids up and headed to the store with our lists of school supplies and groceries. Two carts and two hours later our mission was accomplished with little difficulties. Now all I had to do was get it labeled and in their bags.
When we got home Monday evening I labeled all their things, and loaded their book bags. Only one thing was missing in their bags.....their pencils. The school lists asked for a combined total of 68 sharpened pencils. As I mentioned before I am a procrastinator. Last year I waited til the night before school started to sharpen all their pencils. I was up late and ended up overheating our electric pencil sharpener. This year I decided I was not going to do that. I put the very first of the 68 pencils in the electric sharpener and nothing happened....I mean nothing! It made a noise but, was definitely NOT sharpening. So, I decided to try my eyeliner sharpener. Six pencils later I decided I was going to end up with carpel tunnel in my wrist.
Tuesday I worked a 9 hour day at work. When I got home I needed to do laundry, fix supper, feed the kids, bathe them, get their school clothes ironed, pack their lunches, tuck the kids into bed and sharpened 62 pencils! My husband had an evening meeting so I was on my own for the night. On top of all the preparation for school we are also in the process of moving Josh into his own room and I was going to be out of town for the weekend so I need to clean off/out my desk in the laundry room. By the time 8:30pm rolled around most of my to do list had been checked off (except the sharpening of the pencils) and I was at the end of my rope. The kids were coming up with many excuses not to go to bed and my patience were wearing thin. I kept thinking of the 62 pencils I still needed to sharpen.
Hunter had come down stairs for the second time after being tucked in. I said "What are you doing up? I need you to go to bed so I can finish what I need to so I can go to bed." He replied, "I wanted to help you. I can sharpen the pencils." Then he said 7 little words that have haunted me all week....."I just want you to be happy." Do my kids not see me happy? I am happy, aren't I? My little guy was willing to what he could to make me "happy."
This past weekend I went with a group of ladies to Women of Faith conference in Indianapolis. One of the first sessions Dr. Henry Cloud was talking about living a happy life. He said that research has shown that circumstances only account for 10% of happiness. He began to talk about perspective.....perspective....there is that word again.....My husband just preached a message the previous Sunday on perspective. My thought was "Wow, someone in our group must need to hear about perspective. It just keeps coming up." As the weekend went on the speakers were talking about our worth coming from Christ and how valuable we are to Him. The last session Lucy Swindol spoke about enjoying life. She said, "Live Now, Love Now, Give Now!" God began to speak to my heart.
It was MY perspective that needed to change. I realized how much of my life I spend on things that don't matter in the end. I tirelessly work on keeping a clean and orderly home. Some days I feel like I am going to evolve into an ape from walking around bent over with my knuckles dragging the ground constantly picking toys and things up off the floor. I realized that I attach much of my self worth to the condition of my home. I think so often, "If I could just get the house clean..." Then, on the rare days that I do get it clean, it only lasts a few hours and I am frustrated that it is messed up again.
Not only does my perspective about my self worth need to change but, I also realized this weekend that I compartmentalize my life.....or my kids. I always plan to accomplish X,Y, and Z on my to do list and THEN I will hang out with the kids. Often times they ask if they can help with whatever I am doing. Most of the time I send them off and say, "Mommy will hang out with you when I get this done." Truth is my to do list never ends. Instead I should include them in all that I am doing around the house, teach them how to do it and enjoy that time with them. More of my focus needs to be on the legacy I am leaving in my children.....not in my house. I don't want my headstone to read "She kept a clean home."
I am working on adjusting my perspective to who I am in Christ and not on my worth based on the state of my home. And begin to remember to include my kids in all aspects of my daily life. Enjoy life with them even if my house is not clean.
"Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus." 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18
I am a procrastinator. Not because I just make a choice to push it off to later, but because I have so much going on that I am always dealing with the emergent. Last week school shopping became the emergent. Monday was my only day off before school started so, I loaded all 4 kids up and headed to the store with our lists of school supplies and groceries. Two carts and two hours later our mission was accomplished with little difficulties. Now all I had to do was get it labeled and in their bags.
When we got home Monday evening I labeled all their things, and loaded their book bags. Only one thing was missing in their bags.....their pencils. The school lists asked for a combined total of 68 sharpened pencils. As I mentioned before I am a procrastinator. Last year I waited til the night before school started to sharpen all their pencils. I was up late and ended up overheating our electric pencil sharpener. This year I decided I was not going to do that. I put the very first of the 68 pencils in the electric sharpener and nothing happened....I mean nothing! It made a noise but, was definitely NOT sharpening. So, I decided to try my eyeliner sharpener. Six pencils later I decided I was going to end up with carpel tunnel in my wrist.
Tuesday I worked a 9 hour day at work. When I got home I needed to do laundry, fix supper, feed the kids, bathe them, get their school clothes ironed, pack their lunches, tuck the kids into bed and sharpened 62 pencils! My husband had an evening meeting so I was on my own for the night. On top of all the preparation for school we are also in the process of moving Josh into his own room and I was going to be out of town for the weekend so I need to clean off/out my desk in the laundry room. By the time 8:30pm rolled around most of my to do list had been checked off (except the sharpening of the pencils) and I was at the end of my rope. The kids were coming up with many excuses not to go to bed and my patience were wearing thin. I kept thinking of the 62 pencils I still needed to sharpen.
Hunter had come down stairs for the second time after being tucked in. I said "What are you doing up? I need you to go to bed so I can finish what I need to so I can go to bed." He replied, "I wanted to help you. I can sharpen the pencils." Then he said 7 little words that have haunted me all week....."I just want you to be happy." Do my kids not see me happy? I am happy, aren't I? My little guy was willing to what he could to make me "happy."
This past weekend I went with a group of ladies to Women of Faith conference in Indianapolis. One of the first sessions Dr. Henry Cloud was talking about living a happy life. He said that research has shown that circumstances only account for 10% of happiness. He began to talk about perspective.....perspective....there is that word again.....My husband just preached a message the previous Sunday on perspective. My thought was "Wow, someone in our group must need to hear about perspective. It just keeps coming up." As the weekend went on the speakers were talking about our worth coming from Christ and how valuable we are to Him. The last session Lucy Swindol spoke about enjoying life. She said, "Live Now, Love Now, Give Now!" God began to speak to my heart.
It was MY perspective that needed to change. I realized how much of my life I spend on things that don't matter in the end. I tirelessly work on keeping a clean and orderly home. Some days I feel like I am going to evolve into an ape from walking around bent over with my knuckles dragging the ground constantly picking toys and things up off the floor. I realized that I attach much of my self worth to the condition of my home. I think so often, "If I could just get the house clean..." Then, on the rare days that I do get it clean, it only lasts a few hours and I am frustrated that it is messed up again.
Not only does my perspective about my self worth need to change but, I also realized this weekend that I compartmentalize my life.....or my kids. I always plan to accomplish X,Y, and Z on my to do list and THEN I will hang out with the kids. Often times they ask if they can help with whatever I am doing. Most of the time I send them off and say, "Mommy will hang out with you when I get this done." Truth is my to do list never ends. Instead I should include them in all that I am doing around the house, teach them how to do it and enjoy that time with them. More of my focus needs to be on the legacy I am leaving in my children.....not in my house. I don't want my headstone to read "She kept a clean home."
I am working on adjusting my perspective to who I am in Christ and not on my worth based on the state of my home. And begin to remember to include my kids in all aspects of my daily life. Enjoy life with them even if my house is not clean.
"Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus." 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18
Sunday, August 14, 2011
Canoeing or Couples Therapy??
One of the highlights of my summer is our annual canoe trip with the youth group. Each year I look forward to all the memories that are made while swimming, camping, playing the "song game" around the campfire, visiting Ally Springs and having Sunday morning church in the midst of God's creation. This year I was looking forward to much of the same especially canoeing with my man! You know...my husband and life partner.....
Jason and I have been canoe partners for the past few years and we did pretty well. Last year we only tipped once....and it was the very last turn of the 6 mile journey. So, I was anticipating much of the same this year....a nice relaxing float down the cool, clear river.....I was mistaken!!
So, we get to the river and choose our canoe. We (Jason) opted for an aluminum one. It was like sitting on a balance beam!! You had to sit perfectly dead center with perfect posture or it would tip to either side. Then we also agreed to pull one of our students on a tube tied to the back of our canoe....so we had some extra weight we were pulling.
As we were approaching the first bend in the river I was still trying to adjust and sit center in the canoe and was SO not ready to start paddling. Jason is in the back of the canoe yelling "Right! Right! Paddle on your right!!" I didn't react quick enough and we ended up running into the fallen tree that was in the water I panicked and leaned one way, Jason leaned the other and we both ended up in the river!!
Now we were already wet and I was frustrated. I was not sure which side to paddle on and was upset that Jason had yelled at me and was irritated already at me. We had barely started and I felt we had already failed.
We get back in the canoe and start down the river again. As we were trying to pick up speed to get through a low spot in the river we ran out of slack in the rope in back and almost pulled to a stop and we were---stuck, bottomed out-- on the rocks in the bottom of the river. We had not even made it through the first two turns of our journey and it seemed we were out of our canoe more than we were in it.
At one point the water ahead looked tricky and I was so frustrated trying to figure out what side of the canoe to paddle on I just jumped out of the canoe before we even had the chance to flip! I didn't want to flip again! Then, instead of getting back in the canoe I decided I would rather walk in the river than try to paddle through the obstacles.
So Jason is in the back of the canoe paddling with the nose of the canoe up in the air due to the imbalance while pulling the tuber on the back. The whole time he is saying, "Get back in the canoe!" There were people hanging out along the banks of the river watching us. One guy looked and me and said, "Did you loose your boat? You would rather walk than ride in the boat??" Another lady said, "What's the matter? You don't trust him?"
I did get back into the canoe and we joined the rest of our group at the spot we always stop to play and swim. As I sat along the water asking myself what was the matter with me I realized two things: 1. I did not really trust Jason to get us through the difficult stuff. Not that he couldn't get us through it but, He was not communicating clearly with me how we were going to get through it. and 2. I did not like feeling out of control when we tipped. I liked being in the cool refreshing water. I just wanted to be the one to make the choice to get in. Not fall in out of control.
We spent the next few miles of our journey fumbling through. Trying to maneuver around the groups of partying tubers and the fallen trees. At one point Jason looked at me and said, "Cheri, this is like marriage! You cannot bail on me and jump out of the canoe. There is no back door! Stay in this with me!"
We asked our tag along tuber to join another canoe to lighten our load a bit. After dropping the extra weight, and I learned not to panic, and Jason started communicating clearly with me about what we needed to do to conquer the upcoming obstacles we made a great team! I began to trust him fully.
Through our entire adventure I could not help but think how right Jason was. Being canoe partners was just like marriage. It takes team work, trust and communication. We had to work in sync together to survive the obstacles. I had to trust that Jason had our best interest in mind. He had to clearly communicate with me what to do and how to do it. If he didn't communicate and I didn't trust him we just ended up working against each other.
In our journey of marriage we will always face obstacles and uncertain times. Sometimes we have to get rid of things that may be weighing us down. But, if we communicate and trust one another we can make it through anything!!
Oh yeah, and I prayed ALOT that day! Prayer is another key part of a successful marriage!!
"For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh." Genesis 2:24
"So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore, what God has joined together let man not separate." Matthew 19:6
Jason and I have been canoe partners for the past few years and we did pretty well. Last year we only tipped once....and it was the very last turn of the 6 mile journey. So, I was anticipating much of the same this year....a nice relaxing float down the cool, clear river.....I was mistaken!!
So, we get to the river and choose our canoe. We (Jason) opted for an aluminum one. It was like sitting on a balance beam!! You had to sit perfectly dead center with perfect posture or it would tip to either side. Then we also agreed to pull one of our students on a tube tied to the back of our canoe....so we had some extra weight we were pulling.
As we were approaching the first bend in the river I was still trying to adjust and sit center in the canoe and was SO not ready to start paddling. Jason is in the back of the canoe yelling "Right! Right! Paddle on your right!!" I didn't react quick enough and we ended up running into the fallen tree that was in the water I panicked and leaned one way, Jason leaned the other and we both ended up in the river!!
Now we were already wet and I was frustrated. I was not sure which side to paddle on and was upset that Jason had yelled at me and was irritated already at me. We had barely started and I felt we had already failed.
We get back in the canoe and start down the river again. As we were trying to pick up speed to get through a low spot in the river we ran out of slack in the rope in back and almost pulled to a stop and we were---stuck, bottomed out-- on the rocks in the bottom of the river. We had not even made it through the first two turns of our journey and it seemed we were out of our canoe more than we were in it.
At one point the water ahead looked tricky and I was so frustrated trying to figure out what side of the canoe to paddle on I just jumped out of the canoe before we even had the chance to flip! I didn't want to flip again! Then, instead of getting back in the canoe I decided I would rather walk in the river than try to paddle through the obstacles.
So Jason is in the back of the canoe paddling with the nose of the canoe up in the air due to the imbalance while pulling the tuber on the back. The whole time he is saying, "Get back in the canoe!" There were people hanging out along the banks of the river watching us. One guy looked and me and said, "Did you loose your boat? You would rather walk than ride in the boat??" Another lady said, "What's the matter? You don't trust him?"
I did get back into the canoe and we joined the rest of our group at the spot we always stop to play and swim. As I sat along the water asking myself what was the matter with me I realized two things: 1. I did not really trust Jason to get us through the difficult stuff. Not that he couldn't get us through it but, He was not communicating clearly with me how we were going to get through it. and 2. I did not like feeling out of control when we tipped. I liked being in the cool refreshing water. I just wanted to be the one to make the choice to get in. Not fall in out of control.
We spent the next few miles of our journey fumbling through. Trying to maneuver around the groups of partying tubers and the fallen trees. At one point Jason looked at me and said, "Cheri, this is like marriage! You cannot bail on me and jump out of the canoe. There is no back door! Stay in this with me!"
We asked our tag along tuber to join another canoe to lighten our load a bit. After dropping the extra weight, and I learned not to panic, and Jason started communicating clearly with me about what we needed to do to conquer the upcoming obstacles we made a great team! I began to trust him fully.
Through our entire adventure I could not help but think how right Jason was. Being canoe partners was just like marriage. It takes team work, trust and communication. We had to work in sync together to survive the obstacles. I had to trust that Jason had our best interest in mind. He had to clearly communicate with me what to do and how to do it. If he didn't communicate and I didn't trust him we just ended up working against each other.
In our journey of marriage we will always face obstacles and uncertain times. Sometimes we have to get rid of things that may be weighing us down. But, if we communicate and trust one another we can make it through anything!!
Oh yeah, and I prayed ALOT that day! Prayer is another key part of a successful marriage!!
"For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh." Genesis 2:24
"So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore, what God has joined together let man not separate." Matthew 19:6
Friday, July 29, 2011
I am still here!!
Hey Everybody! I am sorry it has been so long since I have posted......it has been a crazy month (more about that later)
This weekend I am going canoeing with the youth group. My kids are at my parents. I miss them already!! It is kind of strange not to worry about checking to be sure no one has to go potty before we leave or cutting some one's food up before they eat it!
I just wanted to let everyone know that I am still alive! Check back early next week for a new post. Have a Great weekend!!!
This weekend I am going canoeing with the youth group. My kids are at my parents. I miss them already!! It is kind of strange not to worry about checking to be sure no one has to go potty before we leave or cutting some one's food up before they eat it!
I just wanted to let everyone know that I am still alive! Check back early next week for a new post. Have a Great weekend!!!
Monday, July 18, 2011
Who's got your back?
So, anyone who knows me well, knows that my summer motto is: Spend as much time as humanly possible at the pool! I guess the big reason is, I feel like it is the only place I can really relax. When I am at the pool there is no way I can be distracted by housework!
By this time of the summer, the kids are kind of done with the pool. They have already mastered the water slide and 3 of the 4 are allowed all access to the deep end and diving board so, the thrill is gone. In an effort to renew their interest and kill the boredom, I went to the store and bought some diving sticks and a fish diving set. The set included several small plastic fish, (none that could replace Mr. Goldberg) some shells, starfish, seahorses, a net to catch them and ONE larger neon green fish.
After about three and a half hours at the pool I decided it was time to face reality and head home to make supper. I began to round up the kids and their new favorite pool toys. Amazingly enough we had all but one! We were missing the ONE neon green fish. I was ready to cut our losses and head home. I'd had enough fish hunting at the pool for one week. But, Jake did not agree. He began to protest with large tears. Saying, "that one was my favorite!!"
I asked my other kids if they had the missing fish or knew where it was. Josh said, "Some kid took it. He said it was his and he took it home." Frustrated but still wanting to make every effort to recover our missing fish I asked the kids to walk around the pool and see if the kid had dropped it. A few minutes later Josh comes back pointing across the pool stating the kid still had our fish! I said, "Did you ask him for it?" Josh said that he had and the boy said, "NO!"
We've had encounters with this same kid earlier in the summer. He was hitting and pushing my kids around. At that time I had just instructed them to put distance between themselves and him. Reminding them that we are to "turn the other cheek." Today, however, he was hanging out with a group of boys that had been bullying my kids and their group of friends. This group of bullies had already tried to steal one of our super soakers and was using their own squirt guns to spray Josh and his friends with a mixture of sunscreen and water. I decided enough was enough, and I was NOT leaving without the fish!!
I handed Josh my swimsuit cover up and marched into the water. I tapped the boy on the shoulder and asked for the fish back. He said, "NO, it is mine." I said, "No it isn't, it is ours." With no further arguments the kid handed over the fish. As I walked back on shore and returned the fish to the kids they cheered! They asked how I got the fish back. I told them, "I've got your back!" At that moment, I was my kids' hero!
We all need a hero. My mom has been my hero many times too. Even today, she was willing to drop all she had on her plate at home (which is a lot!) and drive three hours to fill in for my babysitter tomorrow so I could go to work. But, truth be told, she can't always be my hero. But, God can. He can help us fight our battles and solve our problems. And sometimes when there is no solution He can give us peace to deal with the problem.
"If God is for us, who can be against us?" Romans 8:31
God has our back!
By this time of the summer, the kids are kind of done with the pool. They have already mastered the water slide and 3 of the 4 are allowed all access to the deep end and diving board so, the thrill is gone. In an effort to renew their interest and kill the boredom, I went to the store and bought some diving sticks and a fish diving set. The set included several small plastic fish, (none that could replace Mr. Goldberg) some shells, starfish, seahorses, a net to catch them and ONE larger neon green fish.
After about three and a half hours at the pool I decided it was time to face reality and head home to make supper. I began to round up the kids and their new favorite pool toys. Amazingly enough we had all but one! We were missing the ONE neon green fish. I was ready to cut our losses and head home. I'd had enough fish hunting at the pool for one week. But, Jake did not agree. He began to protest with large tears. Saying, "that one was my favorite!!"
I asked my other kids if they had the missing fish or knew where it was. Josh said, "Some kid took it. He said it was his and he took it home." Frustrated but still wanting to make every effort to recover our missing fish I asked the kids to walk around the pool and see if the kid had dropped it. A few minutes later Josh comes back pointing across the pool stating the kid still had our fish! I said, "Did you ask him for it?" Josh said that he had and the boy said, "NO!"
We've had encounters with this same kid earlier in the summer. He was hitting and pushing my kids around. At that time I had just instructed them to put distance between themselves and him. Reminding them that we are to "turn the other cheek." Today, however, he was hanging out with a group of boys that had been bullying my kids and their group of friends. This group of bullies had already tried to steal one of our super soakers and was using their own squirt guns to spray Josh and his friends with a mixture of sunscreen and water. I decided enough was enough, and I was NOT leaving without the fish!!
I handed Josh my swimsuit cover up and marched into the water. I tapped the boy on the shoulder and asked for the fish back. He said, "NO, it is mine." I said, "No it isn't, it is ours." With no further arguments the kid handed over the fish. As I walked back on shore and returned the fish to the kids they cheered! They asked how I got the fish back. I told them, "I've got your back!" At that moment, I was my kids' hero!
We all need a hero. My mom has been my hero many times too. Even today, she was willing to drop all she had on her plate at home (which is a lot!) and drive three hours to fill in for my babysitter tomorrow so I could go to work. But, truth be told, she can't always be my hero. But, God can. He can help us fight our battles and solve our problems. And sometimes when there is no solution He can give us peace to deal with the problem.
"If God is for us, who can be against us?" Romans 8:31
God has our back!
Saturday, July 16, 2011
Finding Mr. Goldberg....
It is funny how kids latch on to a particular toy. Especially, one that is small and seemingly insignificant compared to all the others.....Last summer at the Casey Popcorn Festival Hunter won a small plastic goldfish toy, which is fondly referred to in our home as "Mr. Goldberg." Mr. Goldberg often will be found resting in a jar of water (his fish bowl) on my counter. He eats breakfast with Hunter on a regular basis. Mr. Goldberg has also been on trips back home with us for visits and has always managed to make it home and back to his jar of water.
Today, Hunter thought that Mr. Goldberg would enjoy a trip to the swimming pool too! I was a little unsure, afraid that Mr. Goldberg may get lost in such a "big" body of water. Hunter assured me that he would keep track of him. So, Mr. Goldberg joined us at the pool.
We had been there for a couple of hours and Hunter had lived up to his promise always aware of Mr. Goldberg's where abouts. Then, shortly before it was time for us to leave we realized Mr. Goldberg was MIA! I could not imagine leaving with out him and Hunter's disappointment. And it wasn't like I could just go to Walmart and just buy a new one! I had no idea how I could replace Mr. Goldberg. There was no way we could leave without him.
By this time of day the pool was pretty empty so I decided to sweep the pool looking for our missing Mr. Goldberg. My friend and I walked/swam every inch of the shallow end of the pool looking for our missing fish. I began to pray as I often do when I cannot find something.
As we were carrying out our search and rescue for Hunter's missing "pet" I began to think of the parable of the "Lost Sheep." The shepherd would leave his 99 sheep to go and find the one. The parable is found a couple of times in the new testament, always talking about the lengths God, our Shepherd will go to come for us when we are lost. But, I thought also of how we are to follow His example. We are to reach out to others who maybe "lost."
I began to think of the scripture in Galatians's that says we are to reach out to help our friends who maybe struggling with sin. It is our job to help restore them. Not to judge them but encourage and support them. Gently point them back in the direction of Christ. I contemplated the lengths I went to find Mr. Goldberg, and would I or have I gone to those lengths to help friends I knew were struggling.
"Stoop down and reach out to those who are oppressed. Share their burdens, and so completes Christ's law. If you think you are too good for that, you are badly deceived." Galatians's 6:2-3 (The Message)
My prayer is that the next time I know a friend is struggling that I may go to such lengths to share in their burdens and help them find their way home.
By the way, we found Mr. Goldberg and he is safe and sound is his jar of water on my counter!
Today, Hunter thought that Mr. Goldberg would enjoy a trip to the swimming pool too! I was a little unsure, afraid that Mr. Goldberg may get lost in such a "big" body of water. Hunter assured me that he would keep track of him. So, Mr. Goldberg joined us at the pool.
We had been there for a couple of hours and Hunter had lived up to his promise always aware of Mr. Goldberg's where abouts. Then, shortly before it was time for us to leave we realized Mr. Goldberg was MIA! I could not imagine leaving with out him and Hunter's disappointment. And it wasn't like I could just go to Walmart and just buy a new one! I had no idea how I could replace Mr. Goldberg. There was no way we could leave without him.
By this time of day the pool was pretty empty so I decided to sweep the pool looking for our missing Mr. Goldberg. My friend and I walked/swam every inch of the shallow end of the pool looking for our missing fish. I began to pray as I often do when I cannot find something.
As we were carrying out our search and rescue for Hunter's missing "pet" I began to think of the parable of the "Lost Sheep." The shepherd would leave his 99 sheep to go and find the one. The parable is found a couple of times in the new testament, always talking about the lengths God, our Shepherd will go to come for us when we are lost. But, I thought also of how we are to follow His example. We are to reach out to others who maybe "lost."
I began to think of the scripture in Galatians's that says we are to reach out to help our friends who maybe struggling with sin. It is our job to help restore them. Not to judge them but encourage and support them. Gently point them back in the direction of Christ. I contemplated the lengths I went to find Mr. Goldberg, and would I or have I gone to those lengths to help friends I knew were struggling.
"Stoop down and reach out to those who are oppressed. Share their burdens, and so completes Christ's law. If you think you are too good for that, you are badly deceived." Galatians's 6:2-3 (The Message)
My prayer is that the next time I know a friend is struggling that I may go to such lengths to share in their burdens and help them find their way home.
By the way, we found Mr. Goldberg and he is safe and sound is his jar of water on my counter!
Sunday, July 10, 2011
Time.......Have you mastered it or has it mastered you?
Tick, tick, tick, tick.....That is the sound I hear in my head every minute of every hour of everyday! It is like a ticking time bomb that I am slave to......some days I fear that if I don't pay full attention to the minutes ticking away and making the "most" of my time then I will explode!! I know, I know, I need help!
About a week ago we were at the pool and Josh noticed there was a girl from his class there too. I think he had a crush on her. He would sort of play in circles around her.....ever aware of her presents but too shy to actually say "Hi!" After about 45 minutes she left with her family and Josh never said hi. He looked at me and said, "I wish I could turn back time." I said, "Why?" He replied, "because I would go back and say 'hi' to her." I asked him if he regretted it and he said "YES!".....
Josh's comment of turning back time reminded me of a devotional I read about a month ago. There was one line in it that has been gnawing at me ever since......."Learn to master time, or it will master you." WHOA!! I think I have been mastered!!
Each day that I wake up, I think of my day in spans of time. Like, "OK, I have from 9 - 12 to clean the house, do laundry, go through my coupons and adds. Pick kids up at 12, feed them lunch and have them change....pool from 1 to 3:30p then home for showers and dinner, then off to Vacation Bible School, home Pj's on and to bed..." Only to get up the next day and do it all again! Constantly aware of the clock, and NEVER accomplishing what I had set out to in my allotted amount of time....forever frustrated!!
This is not what Jesus meant when He said that He came that we may have "abundant life." God is the Creator of time. His word says that "with the Lord a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day." 2 Peter 3:8 God is not bound by time. I know that when I turn my focus toward HIM instead of on my impossible-to-live-by agenda, the chains of my ticking "time" bomb begin to fade.
Josh's comment about turning back time hit close to my heart. I began to think about not making the best use of my time with my kids and one day I will wake up and they will be gone...just like Josh's crush....and I will be the one wishing to turn back time.
I have not learned to master time but, I am working on it. My prayer is....
"Teach us (me) to number our (my) days aright, that we (I) may gain a heart of wisdom." Psalm 90:12
About a week ago we were at the pool and Josh noticed there was a girl from his class there too. I think he had a crush on her. He would sort of play in circles around her.....ever aware of her presents but too shy to actually say "Hi!" After about 45 minutes she left with her family and Josh never said hi. He looked at me and said, "I wish I could turn back time." I said, "Why?" He replied, "because I would go back and say 'hi' to her." I asked him if he regretted it and he said "YES!".....
Josh's comment of turning back time reminded me of a devotional I read about a month ago. There was one line in it that has been gnawing at me ever since......."Learn to master time, or it will master you." WHOA!! I think I have been mastered!!
Each day that I wake up, I think of my day in spans of time. Like, "OK, I have from 9 - 12 to clean the house, do laundry, go through my coupons and adds. Pick kids up at 12, feed them lunch and have them change....pool from 1 to 3:30p then home for showers and dinner, then off to Vacation Bible School, home Pj's on and to bed..." Only to get up the next day and do it all again! Constantly aware of the clock, and NEVER accomplishing what I had set out to in my allotted amount of time....forever frustrated!!
This is not what Jesus meant when He said that He came that we may have "abundant life." God is the Creator of time. His word says that "with the Lord a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day." 2 Peter 3:8 God is not bound by time. I know that when I turn my focus toward HIM instead of on my impossible-to-live-by agenda, the chains of my ticking "time" bomb begin to fade.
Josh's comment about turning back time hit close to my heart. I began to think about not making the best use of my time with my kids and one day I will wake up and they will be gone...just like Josh's crush....and I will be the one wishing to turn back time.
I have not learned to master time but, I am working on it. My prayer is....
"Teach us (me) to number our (my) days aright, that we (I) may gain a heart of wisdom." Psalm 90:12
Tuesday, July 5, 2011
"Kid College"
It is summer time!! Love it! To me, summer has always meant staying up late, sleeping in, swimming, hanging out with friends, vacation, baseball games, little to no responsibility, and most of all trying to forget and stay as far away from school as possible!! So, since I am now an adult and cannot follow my own expectations of summer I have tried to allow my kiddos to enjoy summer the way I did. But, this summer is slightly different.....
If you have read my prior posts "Joshua" and "Hunter" you know that this school year was very difficult academically. Both of my boys have had real struggles making the expected progress for their grade levels. So, as we were praying for God to give us direction in how to help our boys succeed we were given the opportunity to send them to a Special Needs summer reading program at Eastern Illinois University. The program is from 9am to 12pm Monday thru Thursday for the month of July. Feeling that this was a complete answer to prayer we signed all three of our school age children up for it.
We talked to the kids about it when we signed them up, calling it "Kid College". They were still in school at the time and had not had a taste of freedom (from school) yet. So, they were actually quite cooperative and excited. At the time we were signing them up a part of me felt guilty, like I was taking their summer away.....robbing them of something....But, I knew that with all the best intentions in the world I would not be able to give them the extra help they needed with reading.
Last night we were at the pool and one of their friends was asking about planning a sleepover. I said, "Well the kids have to get up in the morning for summer school." That was it!! The switch was flipped and the excitement for "Kid College" was suddenly replaced with dread and despair!! For the following 14 hours I heard nothing but complaining....."Mom I don't want to go!" "You are taking our summer from us!" "WHY are YOU doing this to US???" Jason said, "They act like we are sending them in front of the firing squad!" I so badly wanted to fold....let them stay home...have sleep overs and sleep in. But, I knew that we had made this decision with THEIR best interest in mind!
As the kids were complaining to me, asking me why I had done this to them, and digging their heels in each step of the way, I could not help but think of times in my life when God had made plans for me with my best interest in mind and I was the one digging my heels in and complaining. One instance in particular was moving away from our families.
For several years my husband had talked about moving, going to seminary somewhere far away, or looking for a church position away from our hometown. And for years I dug my heels in. I would say things like, "You can go ahead and go away to seminary, Josh and I are staying here." or "My kids are graduating in Blue and White!!" (Our hometown school colors) The last thing I wanted to do was move my kids away from their grandparents and extended family. God had other plans.......
Fast forward several years and we are now settled in to a new "hometown" 3 hours away from our families. At the time it seemed so scary and unfair that God would ask such a thing of us. To move away from all we had ever known....way outside our comfort zone. He (God) had asked me to do the one thing I had said for years that I did NOT want to do. But, if you asked me today if I would do it all over again I would say "ABSOLUTELY!!" I would not trade it for the world now! In moving away from our hometown I feel we have the room to be who God created us to be. Don't get me wrong...it has been hard and I miss our family terribly! But, I know that God has used it to grow me in ways that would not have been possible if we had not followed the plans He had for us.
The next time I start to dig my heels in against the plans God has for me I hope to remember that He has my best interest in mind just as I have my kids' best interest in mind. There is a scripture that reminds me of this. I have it engraved on the front of my Bible.....
"For I know the plans I have for you', declares the LORD, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11
By the way, the kids LOVED "Kids College" and cannot wait to go back tomorrow! Jake wishes he could go too!
If you have read my prior posts "Joshua" and "Hunter" you know that this school year was very difficult academically. Both of my boys have had real struggles making the expected progress for their grade levels. So, as we were praying for God to give us direction in how to help our boys succeed we were given the opportunity to send them to a Special Needs summer reading program at Eastern Illinois University. The program is from 9am to 12pm Monday thru Thursday for the month of July. Feeling that this was a complete answer to prayer we signed all three of our school age children up for it.
We talked to the kids about it when we signed them up, calling it "Kid College". They were still in school at the time and had not had a taste of freedom (from school) yet. So, they were actually quite cooperative and excited. At the time we were signing them up a part of me felt guilty, like I was taking their summer away.....robbing them of something....But, I knew that with all the best intentions in the world I would not be able to give them the extra help they needed with reading.
Last night we were at the pool and one of their friends was asking about planning a sleepover. I said, "Well the kids have to get up in the morning for summer school." That was it!! The switch was flipped and the excitement for "Kid College" was suddenly replaced with dread and despair!! For the following 14 hours I heard nothing but complaining....."Mom I don't want to go!" "You are taking our summer from us!" "WHY are YOU doing this to US???" Jason said, "They act like we are sending them in front of the firing squad!" I so badly wanted to fold....let them stay home...have sleep overs and sleep in. But, I knew that we had made this decision with THEIR best interest in mind!
As the kids were complaining to me, asking me why I had done this to them, and digging their heels in each step of the way, I could not help but think of times in my life when God had made plans for me with my best interest in mind and I was the one digging my heels in and complaining. One instance in particular was moving away from our families.
For several years my husband had talked about moving, going to seminary somewhere far away, or looking for a church position away from our hometown. And for years I dug my heels in. I would say things like, "You can go ahead and go away to seminary, Josh and I are staying here." or "My kids are graduating in Blue and White!!" (Our hometown school colors) The last thing I wanted to do was move my kids away from their grandparents and extended family. God had other plans.......
Fast forward several years and we are now settled in to a new "hometown" 3 hours away from our families. At the time it seemed so scary and unfair that God would ask such a thing of us. To move away from all we had ever known....way outside our comfort zone. He (God) had asked me to do the one thing I had said for years that I did NOT want to do. But, if you asked me today if I would do it all over again I would say "ABSOLUTELY!!" I would not trade it for the world now! In moving away from our hometown I feel we have the room to be who God created us to be. Don't get me wrong...it has been hard and I miss our family terribly! But, I know that God has used it to grow me in ways that would not have been possible if we had not followed the plans He had for us.
The next time I start to dig my heels in against the plans God has for me I hope to remember that He has my best interest in mind just as I have my kids' best interest in mind. There is a scripture that reminds me of this. I have it engraved on the front of my Bible.....
"For I know the plans I have for you', declares the LORD, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11
By the way, the kids LOVED "Kids College" and cannot wait to go back tomorrow! Jake wishes he could go too!
Friday, July 1, 2011
Lessons from a Cereal Box Toy.....
I am a crazy couponer! I love to get great deals!! Since becoming a crazy couponer we have switched from generic cereals to name brand cereals because I can get them cheaper. Along with the switch comes all the benefits of the name brand cereals.....which includes TOYS in the cereal box!! This is something my kids are not well acquainted with. So as I was getting ready for work yesterday morning, the kids were in the kitchen getting breakfast and WW III broke out!! All over a little piece of plastic.....to toy in the cereal box.
For the last 24 hours I have thought over and over about that battle. My kids have more toys then they could begin to play with up stairs in their rooms and yet they were fighting over a little piece of plastic that would hold their interest for a total of maybe 10 minutes. I recently blogged about "A Lesson in Thankfulness" but, that was a lesson I learned in thankfulness......one I don't think my children have learned yet, and it is my job to teach them.
I didn't grow up "poor" but, I there were many things my parents could not afford to give us. I wore hand me down clothes and did not get all the latest and greatest toys that came along. We did not eat out often and did not take family vacations. My dad worked two jobs most of my young years to make ends meet. So, as a parent myself I guess I wanted to give my kids some of the things my parents could not afford to give us. My kids have Nintendo DS's, Nintendo Wii, each one has a TV in their room, and many of the most popular toys that have come out. There are still things I cannot afford to give them but, they do not want for much!!
Lately I have noticed more and more how they have grown to expect things rather than appreciating what they do have. It is not their fault. I have created the situation. I read a blog today called "Cultivating A Grateful Heart" at www.drkathykoch.com, she talks about how children today have so many material possessions that it dulls their level of gratitude. How can they be thankful for what they have come to expect. Dr. Kathy quotes a colleague that said, “How can children be thankful if they always get what they want simply by letting it be known. I believe sometimes the most loving thing we can do for our children is to deny them.”
In our relationship with God as our Father, He does not give us EVERYTHING we ask for because He knows what is best for us. It is not in our best interest to just hand us every little whim and desire we ask for. I need to follow His example and ask Him for wisdom to know how to turn this situation around and begin to "cultivate a grateful heart."
A large part of gratefulness is being content, being satisfied with what we have; not always wanting for more. Paul models a grateful heart in Philippians....my prayer is that I will model this to my children and someday they will be a model of a grateful heart to their children.
"I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want."
Philippians 4:12
For the last 24 hours I have thought over and over about that battle. My kids have more toys then they could begin to play with up stairs in their rooms and yet they were fighting over a little piece of plastic that would hold their interest for a total of maybe 10 minutes. I recently blogged about "A Lesson in Thankfulness" but, that was a lesson I learned in thankfulness......one I don't think my children have learned yet, and it is my job to teach them.
I didn't grow up "poor" but, I there were many things my parents could not afford to give us. I wore hand me down clothes and did not get all the latest and greatest toys that came along. We did not eat out often and did not take family vacations. My dad worked two jobs most of my young years to make ends meet. So, as a parent myself I guess I wanted to give my kids some of the things my parents could not afford to give us. My kids have Nintendo DS's, Nintendo Wii, each one has a TV in their room, and many of the most popular toys that have come out. There are still things I cannot afford to give them but, they do not want for much!!
Lately I have noticed more and more how they have grown to expect things rather than appreciating what they do have. It is not their fault. I have created the situation. I read a blog today called "Cultivating A Grateful Heart" at www.drkathykoch.com, she talks about how children today have so many material possessions that it dulls their level of gratitude. How can they be thankful for what they have come to expect. Dr. Kathy quotes a colleague that said, “How can children be thankful if they always get what they want simply by letting it be known. I believe sometimes the most loving thing we can do for our children is to deny them.”
In our relationship with God as our Father, He does not give us EVERYTHING we ask for because He knows what is best for us. It is not in our best interest to just hand us every little whim and desire we ask for. I need to follow His example and ask Him for wisdom to know how to turn this situation around and begin to "cultivate a grateful heart."
A large part of gratefulness is being content, being satisfied with what we have; not always wanting for more. Paul models a grateful heart in Philippians....my prayer is that I will model this to my children and someday they will be a model of a grateful heart to their children.
"I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want."
Philippians 4:12
Friday, June 24, 2011
Moms know.......EVERYTHING!
As we were getting ready to head to the ballpark for Josh's baseball game the other night I handed Jakob a pair of socks and asked him to find his shoes. I was busy cleaning up dinner and loading the dishwasher and Jake walks through the kitchen and announces as he usually does that he has to use the bathroom. A few minutes pass and again I ask Jake to get his shoes and socks on. He says, "I don't know where my socks went." I say, "Did you take them in the bathroom with you?" The next thing I hear is "HOW did YOU know that??" My response was, "Because I am a mom and mom's know...." Jake says, "EVERYTHING!"
This is a saying my kids are well acquainted with. From the time they were little bitty and they would ask me how I knew something I would always reply, "Because Moms know everything!" I guess it is like when I was little, I remember standing on the furniture and my mom would holler at me from the other room to get down. Shocked by her keen sense of knowing, I asked her how she knew I was standing on the furniture and she told me she had eyes in the back of her head. I don't know if I really believed that she had an extra set of eyes....but I knew she possessed some sort of "super powers" that I didn't have!! So, when I became a mom I wanted to be their super hero!
I think I really had my kids convinced for a few years but, now it is more of a game. You know what it is like when your mind is running a million miles a minute going over your grocery list at the same time you are folding laundry and one of the kids walk up right in the middle of your thoughts and says, "Mom, do you think Tank and Myrtle will ever have babies?" (Tank and Myrtle are our Red Eared Slider turtles) And my automatic response is......"I don't know!" My kids will say, "But you are a MOM and moms know EVERYTHING!"
For the last week I have been pondering the thought of being all knowing. It would definitely have its advantages, many of them obvious. We would know what job to take or how to raise our kids perfectly. But, at the same time many disadvantages like never having another surprise or not having the chance to experience things for the first time. I am thankful that I do not know everything but, God does. "Nothing comes to you that has not passed through His hands first." (Shelia Walsh) So, I can take refuge in that. He knows what is best for me and what is to come.
"O LORD, you have searched me and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways. Before a word is on my tongue you know it completely,.......All the days ordained for me were written in a book before one of them came to be." Psalm 139:1-4, 16
This is a saying my kids are well acquainted with. From the time they were little bitty and they would ask me how I knew something I would always reply, "Because Moms know everything!" I guess it is like when I was little, I remember standing on the furniture and my mom would holler at me from the other room to get down. Shocked by her keen sense of knowing, I asked her how she knew I was standing on the furniture and she told me she had eyes in the back of her head. I don't know if I really believed that she had an extra set of eyes....but I knew she possessed some sort of "super powers" that I didn't have!! So, when I became a mom I wanted to be their super hero!
I think I really had my kids convinced for a few years but, now it is more of a game. You know what it is like when your mind is running a million miles a minute going over your grocery list at the same time you are folding laundry and one of the kids walk up right in the middle of your thoughts and says, "Mom, do you think Tank and Myrtle will ever have babies?" (Tank and Myrtle are our Red Eared Slider turtles) And my automatic response is......"I don't know!" My kids will say, "But you are a MOM and moms know EVERYTHING!"
For the last week I have been pondering the thought of being all knowing. It would definitely have its advantages, many of them obvious. We would know what job to take or how to raise our kids perfectly. But, at the same time many disadvantages like never having another surprise or not having the chance to experience things for the first time. I am thankful that I do not know everything but, God does. "Nothing comes to you that has not passed through His hands first." (Shelia Walsh) So, I can take refuge in that. He knows what is best for me and what is to come.
"O LORD, you have searched me and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways. Before a word is on my tongue you know it completely,.......All the days ordained for me were written in a book before one of them came to be." Psalm 139:1-4, 16
Monday, June 20, 2011
A Lesson on Thankfulness.....
One evening last week Josh's team won their little league game. So, in following local tradition we went with the team to a local ice cream joint to celebrate. On the way, the younger three siblings were begging and pleading for milk shakes too! I was willing to buy them ice cream but, I wanted to get them cones because they were cheaper. Each time I said I would get them cones, they would rebel and again demand a shake! So, I began to lecture them on being thankful that they were even going to get ice cream at all!! I said, "Do you realize there are kids in other countries who have never even tasted ice cream!!! YOU should be THANKFUL you are even getting ice cream at all!!!"
While we were hanging out, outside the ice cream place with all the other winning teams, a group of kids come running around the corner of the building yelling "HOBO! HOBO!" The kids had been creeping around behind the building and thought they had seen a homeless person hiding back there. It soon piqued the interest of all the kids and they made a game of running behind the building trying to get a glimpse of the homeless person they thought they saw.
After my latest lecture to my kids on thankfulness I could not help but think how this just fit right in to my theme of the evening......being aware that they are blessed to have what they have! Life does not just guarantee that you will have a home or get ice cream. These are privileges that should not be so easily taken for granted.
A few days after our evening of celebratory ice cream we were at a family reunion with my husband's family. He has family from the Joplin Missouri area. We had an opportunity to hear first hand the devastation they have recently witnessed. Jason's Aunt Terri was sharing with me how she was vacuuming her carpet one day and thought how dirty it was. She said "Then, I thought to myself, at least I have carpet to vacuum." So many of those around her no longer had a floor to vacuum!
That conversation hit me like a ton of bricks! I had lectured my kids about kids in Africa who had never tasted ice cream.....but have I been truly thankful all that I have in my life?? As I contemplated the concept of thankfulness I could not help but think about the verse Philippians 4:12 "I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want." I believe that a key to thankfulness is learning to be content with what you have. Not looking to the next best thing, or day dreaming about what it is that I want next. Just taking account of what I DO have and being content with that, thankful for it. Not looking at the long list of things that need to be fixed in our hundred year old house and feeling frustrated about it but, being content that I have a warm (or cool) home with a roof over my head. A safe place to raise my kids while making memories in our home! I need to change my perspective on the days when I am worn out from working all day then running to the kids' ball games. At least I have a job, and my kids are healthy and able to play ball!
So, a week after my lecture to my kids.....I am sure I have learned a lot more than they did about thankfulness!! May I not soon forget it!
"Continue to live in Him, rooted and built up in him, strengthened in the faith as your were taught, and overflowing with thankfulness." Colossians 2:7
While we were hanging out, outside the ice cream place with all the other winning teams, a group of kids come running around the corner of the building yelling "HOBO! HOBO!" The kids had been creeping around behind the building and thought they had seen a homeless person hiding back there. It soon piqued the interest of all the kids and they made a game of running behind the building trying to get a glimpse of the homeless person they thought they saw.
After my latest lecture to my kids on thankfulness I could not help but think how this just fit right in to my theme of the evening......being aware that they are blessed to have what they have! Life does not just guarantee that you will have a home or get ice cream. These are privileges that should not be so easily taken for granted.
A few days after our evening of celebratory ice cream we were at a family reunion with my husband's family. He has family from the Joplin Missouri area. We had an opportunity to hear first hand the devastation they have recently witnessed. Jason's Aunt Terri was sharing with me how she was vacuuming her carpet one day and thought how dirty it was. She said "Then, I thought to myself, at least I have carpet to vacuum." So many of those around her no longer had a floor to vacuum!
That conversation hit me like a ton of bricks! I had lectured my kids about kids in Africa who had never tasted ice cream.....but have I been truly thankful all that I have in my life?? As I contemplated the concept of thankfulness I could not help but think about the verse Philippians 4:12 "I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want." I believe that a key to thankfulness is learning to be content with what you have. Not looking to the next best thing, or day dreaming about what it is that I want next. Just taking account of what I DO have and being content with that, thankful for it. Not looking at the long list of things that need to be fixed in our hundred year old house and feeling frustrated about it but, being content that I have a warm (or cool) home with a roof over my head. A safe place to raise my kids while making memories in our home! I need to change my perspective on the days when I am worn out from working all day then running to the kids' ball games. At least I have a job, and my kids are healthy and able to play ball!
So, a week after my lecture to my kids.....I am sure I have learned a lot more than they did about thankfulness!! May I not soon forget it!
"Continue to live in Him, rooted and built up in him, strengthened in the faith as your were taught, and overflowing with thankfulness." Colossians 2:7
Saturday, June 11, 2011
"Friendship"
It is summer time!....which means sleepovers! We are just getting into the sleepover stage with our kids. It's kind of a new experience . I find myself wondering if they are behaving, if they are having a good time, what they are doing and so on....So, when Josh was staying with a buddy the other night Jason texted his mom to check up on Josh. She responded back with a text of praise for Josh and his behaviour saying that Josh was "a good influence" on her son!
Later that evening after Josh got home from his friend's house he was telling me about how much fun he had and gave me a play by play of his past 24 hrs. I was eagerly listening and then he begins to list the reasons why he likes his friend......"He cares about people, he believes in God, and he doesn't say any bad words."
My heart melted to hear him describe the qualities he noticed in his friend. Over that same 24 hour period I had been thinking a lot about friendship and my childhood best friend because it was her birthday.
We had been friends since 3rd grade. We spent the night together all the time, went to church camp together, we usually had a crush on the same boy (most of the time she got him). The only class I ever skipped in High School was with her! We were in each other's weddings....and as we grew in to adulthood I always thought we could pick up where we left off. But, as time went on and our lives went different directions that didn't happen. The last time I talked to her was 2 years ago when I called her to wish her a happy birthday. My birthday wish was not a welcomed wish......we have not spoken since......I think and pray for her often. In that same 24 hour period, my husband made a difficult decision that disappointed his childhood best friend........
So, I began to ponder what friendship is and what the Bible says about friendship. It is not always something that comes easy. It takes time and effort. It is give and take. I also thought I must not be the only one that struggles with it, Lisa Welchel (Blair from the Facts of Life) wrote a book on the difficulties of friendship as an adult woman. Hearts at Home has workshops on finding meaningful friendships. Our lives get so busy with raising kids, cleaning house, working, volunteering, maintaining a marriage, that sometimes we don't have anything left to be a good friend.
The Bible tells us that friendship is important. Ecclesiastes 4:10 says, "If one falls down his friend can help him up. But, pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up!" God made us to be relational people! We need friends!! I pray that God will help me to be more like the friend described in Colossians 3:12-14 "As God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on LOVE, which binds them all together in perfect unity."
Later that evening after Josh got home from his friend's house he was telling me about how much fun he had and gave me a play by play of his past 24 hrs. I was eagerly listening and then he begins to list the reasons why he likes his friend......"He cares about people, he believes in God, and he doesn't say any bad words."
My heart melted to hear him describe the qualities he noticed in his friend. Over that same 24 hour period I had been thinking a lot about friendship and my childhood best friend because it was her birthday.
We had been friends since 3rd grade. We spent the night together all the time, went to church camp together, we usually had a crush on the same boy (most of the time she got him). The only class I ever skipped in High School was with her! We were in each other's weddings....and as we grew in to adulthood I always thought we could pick up where we left off. But, as time went on and our lives went different directions that didn't happen. The last time I talked to her was 2 years ago when I called her to wish her a happy birthday. My birthday wish was not a welcomed wish......we have not spoken since......I think and pray for her often. In that same 24 hour period, my husband made a difficult decision that disappointed his childhood best friend........
So, I began to ponder what friendship is and what the Bible says about friendship. It is not always something that comes easy. It takes time and effort. It is give and take. I also thought I must not be the only one that struggles with it, Lisa Welchel (Blair from the Facts of Life) wrote a book on the difficulties of friendship as an adult woman. Hearts at Home has workshops on finding meaningful friendships. Our lives get so busy with raising kids, cleaning house, working, volunteering, maintaining a marriage, that sometimes we don't have anything left to be a good friend.
The Bible tells us that friendship is important. Ecclesiastes 4:10 says, "If one falls down his friend can help him up. But, pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up!" God made us to be relational people! We need friends!! I pray that God will help me to be more like the friend described in Colossians 3:12-14 "As God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on LOVE, which binds them all together in perfect unity."
Wednesday, June 8, 2011
"Mommy, Go back to bed!"
Tuesday morning I was getting ready for work and Jake came downstairs and says, "Mommy you need to go back to bed! You are not supposed to be up yet!" He wanted to snuggle with me before I got up. I stopped my morning routine and rocked him for a few minutes and was able to convince him to snuggle with daddy. A few minutes later Jake came walking in the bathroom again asking me to go back to bed so I could snuggle him. I said, "Jakey I am sorry, Mommy has to go to work." As a tear ran down his cheek he responded, "Sorry doesn't make it better!"........My heart broke!!
That was like the straw that broke the camel's back! The past few weeks I have really been struggling with feelings of failure....failing at parenting my children. I am not quite sure if it is vacation hangover, or adjusting to the kids being out of school but, whatever it is I have found myself mentally preparing for my kids to need a therapist to deal with how I messed them up. Then the next minute I was sure I was going to be the one to need the therapist!
As I stood at my mirror Tuesday morning dying inside because I didn't want to leave to go to work, I began to read the scripture mirror clings that have hung on my bathroom mirror for the past few years. It was like God had them placed for just that morning!! They said.....
.
2 Corinthians 12:9 "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness."
Psalm 105:4-5 "Look to the LORD and his strength; seek his face always. Remember the wonders he has done"
Isaiah 41:10 "I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."
As I read them I remembered the devotion I had read just a half an hour earlier that said, "Who is in charge of your life? If it is you, then you have good reason to worry. But, if it is I (God), then worry is both unnecessary and counterproductive." (Jesus Calling by Sarah Young)
It was like God gave me a chance to ponder who was in charge of my life....including my parenting.....then through the scriptures on the mirror reminded me of HIS strength and that in the journey of parenting I am not alone. I KNOW that I will fail some days. I am not a perfect parent....the "perfect" earthly parent does not exist. But, if I remember to turn the control over to God and rely on Him, He will give me the strength to be the best parent I can be!
That was like the straw that broke the camel's back! The past few weeks I have really been struggling with feelings of failure....failing at parenting my children. I am not quite sure if it is vacation hangover, or adjusting to the kids being out of school but, whatever it is I have found myself mentally preparing for my kids to need a therapist to deal with how I messed them up. Then the next minute I was sure I was going to be the one to need the therapist!
As I stood at my mirror Tuesday morning dying inside because I didn't want to leave to go to work, I began to read the scripture mirror clings that have hung on my bathroom mirror for the past few years. It was like God had them placed for just that morning!! They said.....
.
2 Corinthians 12:9 "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness."
Psalm 105:4-5 "Look to the LORD and his strength; seek his face always. Remember the wonders he has done"
Isaiah 41:10 "I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."
As I read them I remembered the devotion I had read just a half an hour earlier that said, "Who is in charge of your life? If it is you, then you have good reason to worry. But, if it is I (God), then worry is both unnecessary and counterproductive." (Jesus Calling by Sarah Young)
It was like God gave me a chance to ponder who was in charge of my life....including my parenting.....then through the scriptures on the mirror reminded me of HIS strength and that in the journey of parenting I am not alone. I KNOW that I will fail some days. I am not a perfect parent....the "perfect" earthly parent does not exist. But, if I remember to turn the control over to God and rely on Him, He will give me the strength to be the best parent I can be!
Friday, June 3, 2011
A Dose of Reality and Rest for my Soul.....
We have been home from vacation for almost a week now....and what a week it has been! I feel like I needed a vacation to recover from vacation!! We had a wonderful time but I was not ready to re-enter reality!!
I will be completely honest....this last week I have been irritable, impatient, and well, I will admit just down right GRUMPY!! Those that live and work with me can attest to that! It's like I have zero tolerance for anything. I feel like the Lion who has a thorn in his paw and doesn't want anyone to touch him. But, I could not put my finger on what the "thorn" that was bothering me was......
It has been a busy week. I have not made it to bed before midnight one night. I went to a coupon class Tuesday night, (by the way it was awesome!!) and we had little league games both Wednesday and Thursday nights. Not to mention working all day. I have walked around my house and looked at the unpacked suitcases on my bedroom floor, the piles of laundry in the laundry room, the messes in my kids' rooms, the dust bunnies on my floors and let that completely steal my joy!
Today is my day off and I had huge plans and expectations on my self to clean my house from top to bottom. But, the reality is, it is simply impossible to accomplish that in one day when you have four children. Most of the time I am not willing to accept that reality! My track record is to set these unattainable goals for myself and family and then melt down when the goal is not achieved.....I know history repeats itself.....and I was not up for a rerun today.
So, in an attempt to come to grips with reality, instead of jumping in to full crazy woman cleaning mode, I decided I need to do some soul searching to prevent another repeat........I have read a couple of devotionals and scripture this morning, along with a couple of blogs. It is amazing how quickly the view of your own life and reality can change when seen in perspective of other's lives and struggles, and God's Word. I was quickly reminded that my idealistic goals of attaining and maintaining a perfectly organized and clean house were just a little out of whack!!
I have allowed myself to become weary and burdened by all of my self inflicted expectations instead of focusing on Him and the blessings He has given me. There are others who are burdened with much bigger worries than I! God has provided for ALL my needs, blessed me with a job, a home, four amazing children, and an awesome supportive husband! So, my focus should be on Him and thanking Him for His bountiful blessings and peace.
Matthew 11:28 says, "Come to me, all who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest." No matter what causes us to be weary and burdened whether it be large or small, we can rest in Him! As I am still trying to re coop from vacation and clean my house today, I am going to find rest for my soul in Him!
I will be completely honest....this last week I have been irritable, impatient, and well, I will admit just down right GRUMPY!! Those that live and work with me can attest to that! It's like I have zero tolerance for anything. I feel like the Lion who has a thorn in his paw and doesn't want anyone to touch him. But, I could not put my finger on what the "thorn" that was bothering me was......
It has been a busy week. I have not made it to bed before midnight one night. I went to a coupon class Tuesday night, (by the way it was awesome!!) and we had little league games both Wednesday and Thursday nights. Not to mention working all day. I have walked around my house and looked at the unpacked suitcases on my bedroom floor, the piles of laundry in the laundry room, the messes in my kids' rooms, the dust bunnies on my floors and let that completely steal my joy!
Today is my day off and I had huge plans and expectations on my self to clean my house from top to bottom. But, the reality is, it is simply impossible to accomplish that in one day when you have four children. Most of the time I am not willing to accept that reality! My track record is to set these unattainable goals for myself and family and then melt down when the goal is not achieved.....I know history repeats itself.....and I was not up for a rerun today.
So, in an attempt to come to grips with reality, instead of jumping in to full crazy woman cleaning mode, I decided I need to do some soul searching to prevent another repeat........I have read a couple of devotionals and scripture this morning, along with a couple of blogs. It is amazing how quickly the view of your own life and reality can change when seen in perspective of other's lives and struggles, and God's Word. I was quickly reminded that my idealistic goals of attaining and maintaining a perfectly organized and clean house were just a little out of whack!!
I have allowed myself to become weary and burdened by all of my self inflicted expectations instead of focusing on Him and the blessings He has given me. There are others who are burdened with much bigger worries than I! God has provided for ALL my needs, blessed me with a job, a home, four amazing children, and an awesome supportive husband! So, my focus should be on Him and thanking Him for His bountiful blessings and peace.
Matthew 11:28 says, "Come to me, all who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest." No matter what causes us to be weary and burdened whether it be large or small, we can rest in Him! As I am still trying to re coop from vacation and clean my house today, I am going to find rest for my soul in Him!
Thursday, May 26, 2011
Vacation.....
Tonight at the pool Jake said to me, "We forgot something!! We are missing God! He is supposed to be in my heart and He escaped!!" I laughed and said, "No Jake, He never leaves us!"
If you follow my blog you know that we have been on vacation this week. It has been a much needed break for the norm, an oppurtunity for rest, relaxation, and a chance to leave all our worries behind.........although we haven't rested much.......we have been "rock climbing" at Devil's Lake, exploring at Tommy Bartlett's Exploratory (where Josh rode a bicycle 12 foot off the ground on a 1 inch cable). We waited out a Tornado warning in the lower level of the resort. We have had family movie nights and family dinners and picnics. We were entertained at the Circus World museum. We even saw some Circus wagons that were in the movie "Water For Elephants", an AWESOME magic show, and the kids got to perform in the "Kid's World Circus"! Not to mention the water parks! We have been down more water slides than we can begin to count and fought some killer waves at the Wild Water Dome!......I am exhausted!!
As our vacation is drawing to a close rather quickly....I have been thinking all day about how even though we go on vacation, God never does. I know, it kinda sounds like a "Duh" moment. But really think about it for a minute. God NEVER tires, He never grows weary or needs to "just get away". He NEVER leaves us. I am so thankful for that!
I think of all the quiet prayers I have lifted this week.....prayers for saftey on the road, prayers of protection as we climed to Balanced rock, prayers for those in Joplin, Mo. prayers for those back home I know need comfort, prayers of praise for His beautiful creation in nature, prayers for peace when the kids are bickering.......and the list goes on......and He is there to hear EVERY one!!
So, Jake was half right when he said "We forgot something.." Yes, sometimes we can and do forget God, but He never forgets or leaves us or "escapes our hearts."
Deuteronomy 31:8 "The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged."
If you follow my blog you know that we have been on vacation this week. It has been a much needed break for the norm, an oppurtunity for rest, relaxation, and a chance to leave all our worries behind.........although we haven't rested much.......we have been "rock climbing" at Devil's Lake, exploring at Tommy Bartlett's Exploratory (where Josh rode a bicycle 12 foot off the ground on a 1 inch cable). We waited out a Tornado warning in the lower level of the resort. We have had family movie nights and family dinners and picnics. We were entertained at the Circus World museum. We even saw some Circus wagons that were in the movie "Water For Elephants", an AWESOME magic show, and the kids got to perform in the "Kid's World Circus"! Not to mention the water parks! We have been down more water slides than we can begin to count and fought some killer waves at the Wild Water Dome!......I am exhausted!!
As our vacation is drawing to a close rather quickly....I have been thinking all day about how even though we go on vacation, God never does. I know, it kinda sounds like a "Duh" moment. But really think about it for a minute. God NEVER tires, He never grows weary or needs to "just get away". He NEVER leaves us. I am so thankful for that!
I think of all the quiet prayers I have lifted this week.....prayers for saftey on the road, prayers of protection as we climed to Balanced rock, prayers for those in Joplin, Mo. prayers for those back home I know need comfort, prayers of praise for His beautiful creation in nature, prayers for peace when the kids are bickering.......and the list goes on......and He is there to hear EVERY one!!
So, Jake was half right when he said "We forgot something.." Yes, sometimes we can and do forget God, but He never forgets or leaves us or "escapes our hearts."
Deuteronomy 31:8 "The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged."
Saturday, May 21, 2011
Meaningless or Meaningfull.....
So, I used to think that I worked best under stress.....well these days I feel like I crumble under stress....and the last few months have been STRESSFUL!! And this week has been no exception. We have spent the past week preparing for a much needed vacation as well as try to maintain the rest of our life obligations i.e. work, school, ballgames/ practice etc........
I am a detail person, so as vacation approached I was focused on ALL the details. Thanks to my parents timeshare we have a full kitchen in our room so, we decided to eat most of our meals in the room. All week I have been focused on menu/ meal planning, grocery shopping, trying to keep up on the laundry, and the list goes on.
I woke up Friday morning ready to take on the day!! All the groceries had been purchased, laundry was pretty well under control. I thought I had it licked, it was smooth sailing from here right? WRONG!! I don't know about you, but I cannot leave for vacation with a dirty house, so before I could pack I had to clean my house.
I felt like I was moving right along. Kitchen and bathroom had been scrubbed and mopped. Now I was moving on to the living room and dining room when Jake comes around the corner with his pants around his ankles and a huge, I mean HUGE!! wad of toilet paper in his arms!! He had unrolled the ENTIRE roll of toilet paper (I had just put on the holder) and was carrying it into the kitchen. And I am not talking about a regular roll of toilet paper, it was a DOUBLE roll!!! I could not believe my eyes.....and still don't understand what he was thinking. I stood there and re rolled the entire roll. Then, I gave him a five min tutorial on the four square count.
About 8 hours later I am still trying to finish last minute things in the house and pack for a family of 6 for a seven day trip. At this point I am in frantic mode!! I have asked about 50 times for the kids to find their Nintendo DS's, Leapsters, and sunglasses. No one seems to care as much as I do that they have these things! Their rooms still look like a tornado had went through it, and all I want to do is crawl in bed and wait for the "cleaning fairy" to show up over night! At this point everyone in the house knows mom has had it!!!
Josh says to me, "Mom, why do always get so grumpy when you are stressed out?" Ouch! I knew he was right. My focus had been totally in the wrong direction and I was drained of all energy and no good to anyone at that point.
Ecclesiastes 1:2 says "Meaningless, Meaningless! says the Teacher. Utterly meaningless!"........my focus had been on the meaningless! Did it really matter that my house was not up to spec when we left? Did it really matter if the kids found their games?? What really mattered was that my family felt my love for them. A reflection of God's love! My focus was on the the meaningless yesterday.......I am working to keep my focus on the meaningful this week!
Tuesday, May 17, 2011
Confessions of my Heart.......
If my husband had to describe me I am sure one adjective he would use would be competitive......Not so sure that is a good thing, but true! When we were dating we had some pretty heated Rummy matches! Sometimes they would even end up in arguments.....after several years of marriage we now know to keep the peace it is best if we play on the same team! This competitive nature also carries over from time to time watching my son's little league games and in other areas of my life.......
I read a friends facebook post yesterday : Oswald Chambers wrote, “Never make a principle out of your experience; let God be as original with other people as He is with you.” To that I would add, “Be careful not to turn others’ lives into the model for your own.” Allow God to be as creative with you as He is with each of us, From Francis Chan Crazy Love........This post really made me examine my own life when it comes to competition in life.
I read a friends facebook post yesterday : Oswald Chambers wrote, “Never make a principle out of your experience; let God be as original with other people as He is with you.” To that I would add, “Be careful not to turn others’ lives into the model for your own.” Allow God to be as creative with you as He is with each of us, From Francis Chan Crazy Love........This post really made me examine my own life when it comes to competition in life.
I compare a Spiritual life like pregnancy....your appetite totally changes! Before I was pregnant I could not stand yogurt! Now I love it!! Same thing with my life. In my post, "Confessions of a Pastor's wife I shared that at one point in my life I wanted nothing to do with church, now God and His work are central in my life. I also hated writing and English class when I was in school. Now I love to write!!
About five years ago God began to really change my heart. I began to feel a call on my life to move more towards some kind of ministry.....I mean writing and/or speaking. I am not really sure how to move in that direction.....and there are days when I get frustrated and may feel a tinge of competition with someone else that is living out their calling to the fullest....whatever that calling may be. But, I look at their life and think they are having "success" or doing exactly what God called them to do. Sometimes I look up at God and ask, "Lord, when is it my turn? I want to serve you more!" I imagine He sits on His throne and gives me the look I give my kids when they try to tell me how to drive or that I missed a parking spot, and He says to me, "Don't you Trust me? I know what I am doing! I have plans for you!"
In my devotional yesterday from "Jesus Calling" by Sarah Young it said, "The most important thing to determine is what to do right now. Instead of scanning the horizon of your life, looking for things that need to be done, concentrated on the task before you and the One who never leaves your side.......Trust me to show you what to do when you have finished what you are doing now." How true is that! I have many ministry opportunities right in front of me! As long as I live each day to bring Him glory, that is "success".
I think all too often we all look at others' lives from the outside and compete to have the "success" that they have. Life is not a competition. God has a plan for each of us and He never rights the same story twice. Isaiah 55 tells us that His thoughts are Higher than our thoughts, and His ways are higher than our ways! I heard Beth Moore say in a Bible study, "we are only responsible for the yes, He is responsible for the How" (how His plans are accomplished in our lives)
One of the verses closest to my heart is Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."
Saturday, May 14, 2011
Never A Dull Moment.......
Whew!! The weekend is only half over and I am WIPED OUT!! It has been a couple of super busy days. Although with four kids everyday is busy.......and full of "excitement"........NEVER a dull moment!!
Yesterday was Fun Day at the school. I had volunteered to take a shift of face painting, then planned to spend the rest of the day enjoying Fun Day with my kids. So, it was a little bit of craziness trying to get all 6 of us out of the door before 8:15am, it was sort of a blur....As we were all getting out of the car to head into school, I turned around to see if we were all ready to cross the parking lot together. That's when I noticed that Hunter was still wearing the shirt he wore to bed last night! To top it off he had a big tooth paste spot right in the middle of it!! Really!! I was mortified.....how did I miss that!! He just giggled and said, "I forgot!"
Once I got over the shirt incident.....I had a blast at Fun Day! I watched the kids play kick ball, pushed them on the swings, painted faces, played with sidewalk chalk and bubbles, watched them play in the bounce houses, hung out with them at lunch and had a pizza party with the kindergartens! I was worn out but had a great day! The only down side was trying to divide myself as evenly as possible between three classes. At one point Josh was in tears because he didn't want me to leave his class. ( and I worried he would be "too cool" to have me around) It broke my heart!
Today was another story! On the agenda was baking, cleaning, laundry, the boys' first T ball game and a birthday party. I was up with the oven on by 6:45 AM......by 12:45 most of the cleaning and laundry was done, birthday cake completed and a broken glass and window thrown in the mix!
But the "highlight" of my day........We arrived at McDonald's after the T ball game for the birthday party. As I am trying to hurry all four kids out of the car and inside out of the rain, I hear Emma say, "I have a dime stuck in my nose." WHAT!!?? Yes, I heard it right and you read it right....Emma had a dime stuck in her nose!! All I could think was, "Great! I don't have time to go to the ER today!" So, I ushered all four kids in out of the rain, we made our grand entrance to the party with much excitement!! After much blowing and praying....the dime came out!!
We followed the party with a trip to the grocery store, with all four kids! I know better than that but I was desperate! So after telling the kids a hundred times to keep their hands to themselves and to get out of the freezers, I walked out of the store frustrated and out of patience.
As I struggled the feelings of guilt yesterday for not being able to spend enough time with each of my kids, I thought of how God, our Heavenly Father, is all present. I thought of how He is more than enough for each of us who will allow Him to be. I was overwhelmed as I thought of the personal nature of God and how He can/ does meet ALL our needs! Then, today as I was drained and frustrated with my kids I thought about the perfect love of God. His patience with us. I praised Him for not getting so frustrated with me when He has to tell me something a million times, like I do with my kids!
"The LORD, the LORD, the compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness, maintaining love to thousands and forgiving wickedness, rebellion and sin." Exodus 34:6-7
Yesterday was Fun Day at the school. I had volunteered to take a shift of face painting, then planned to spend the rest of the day enjoying Fun Day with my kids. So, it was a little bit of craziness trying to get all 6 of us out of the door before 8:15am, it was sort of a blur....As we were all getting out of the car to head into school, I turned around to see if we were all ready to cross the parking lot together. That's when I noticed that Hunter was still wearing the shirt he wore to bed last night! To top it off he had a big tooth paste spot right in the middle of it!! Really!! I was mortified.....how did I miss that!! He just giggled and said, "I forgot!"
Once I got over the shirt incident.....I had a blast at Fun Day! I watched the kids play kick ball, pushed them on the swings, painted faces, played with sidewalk chalk and bubbles, watched them play in the bounce houses, hung out with them at lunch and had a pizza party with the kindergartens! I was worn out but had a great day! The only down side was trying to divide myself as evenly as possible between three classes. At one point Josh was in tears because he didn't want me to leave his class. ( and I worried he would be "too cool" to have me around) It broke my heart!
Today was another story! On the agenda was baking, cleaning, laundry, the boys' first T ball game and a birthday party. I was up with the oven on by 6:45 AM......by 12:45 most of the cleaning and laundry was done, birthday cake completed and a broken glass and window thrown in the mix!
But the "highlight" of my day........We arrived at McDonald's after the T ball game for the birthday party. As I am trying to hurry all four kids out of the car and inside out of the rain, I hear Emma say, "I have a dime stuck in my nose." WHAT!!?? Yes, I heard it right and you read it right....Emma had a dime stuck in her nose!! All I could think was, "Great! I don't have time to go to the ER today!" So, I ushered all four kids in out of the rain, we made our grand entrance to the party with much excitement!! After much blowing and praying....the dime came out!!
We followed the party with a trip to the grocery store, with all four kids! I know better than that but I was desperate! So after telling the kids a hundred times to keep their hands to themselves and to get out of the freezers, I walked out of the store frustrated and out of patience.
As I struggled the feelings of guilt yesterday for not being able to spend enough time with each of my kids, I thought of how God, our Heavenly Father, is all present. I thought of how He is more than enough for each of us who will allow Him to be. I was overwhelmed as I thought of the personal nature of God and how He can/ does meet ALL our needs! Then, today as I was drained and frustrated with my kids I thought about the perfect love of God. His patience with us. I praised Him for not getting so frustrated with me when He has to tell me something a million times, like I do with my kids!
"The LORD, the LORD, the compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness, maintaining love to thousands and forgiving wickedness, rebellion and sin." Exodus 34:6-7
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
Lesson Learned!!
If you have read my profile you know that I am a nurse. Not just a nurse, but a nurse in a Urology office. You can imagine what topics of conversations come up on a daily basis!! There are words I write in a chart I never imagined I would be writing, let alone SEVERAL times a day!! So, that being said, you may understand why my judgement on appropriateness may be off balance.
The other night while I was making and feeding the kids dinner, I had the TV on in the kitchen. I was watching "Untold Stories of the ER". Being the nurse that I am, I found it very intriguing......the kids not so much. Emma and Josh were watching it with me. They seemed to get a little squeamish when the actor collapsed on the floor and had a seizure. I assured them that all the cases had a happy ending and they always found out what was wrong with the patient and helped them get better. I assure you there was no blood and gore....just real life "rare" cases......
One of the cases that was on that episode was a man that was lying on the gurney randomly screaming. His eyes were open, vitals stable, but not verbally responding. The ER staff was getting ready to call a Psych eval. When one of the nurses leaned in closer she noticed something in the man's ear. It was a large cockroach that was biting his eardrum. Once the bug was removed the man was completely back to normal. Hence the happy ending..... There was no blood and guts, no foul language no "mature content", so I didn't think it was a big deal.
..
Fast forward a few hour.....Jason and I are sitting in the living room watching TV; the kids had been in bed for a couple of hours. Emma comes down stairs crying, wild eyed, not really awake or answering questions, just scared and crying. I thought maybe she was sleep walking again because she had to go to the bathroom. I helped her back to bed and she woke up and asked me about the man with the bug in his ear. She asked if that could happen to her. I reassured her that we did not have roaches in our house and that God would protect her. I rubbed her back, prayed over her and sang a couple of praise songs. She quieted down and fell back to sleep. About 45 minutes later Emma got up again standing next to her bed, wildly swinging her blankey, hitting her bed "to get rid of the bugs!"
OOPS!! Guess my "appropriate gage" was off. I felt horrible. Maybe not such a good idea to watch "Untold Stories of the ER" with my kids.....Her poor little mind kept focusing on that bug! I learned my lesson! I will not do that again!!!
The next day I could not help but think of how powerful our minds are. Everything we do each day originates in our minds. Sometimes all the things running through our minds keeps us up all night. The Bible tells us "whatever is true, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable- if anything is excellent or praiseworthy- THINK about such things......And the God of peace will be with you." Philippians 4:8, 9
The other night while I was making and feeding the kids dinner, I had the TV on in the kitchen. I was watching "Untold Stories of the ER". Being the nurse that I am, I found it very intriguing......the kids not so much. Emma and Josh were watching it with me. They seemed to get a little squeamish when the actor collapsed on the floor and had a seizure. I assured them that all the cases had a happy ending and they always found out what was wrong with the patient and helped them get better. I assure you there was no blood and gore....just real life "rare" cases......
One of the cases that was on that episode was a man that was lying on the gurney randomly screaming. His eyes were open, vitals stable, but not verbally responding. The ER staff was getting ready to call a Psych eval. When one of the nurses leaned in closer she noticed something in the man's ear. It was a large cockroach that was biting his eardrum. Once the bug was removed the man was completely back to normal. Hence the happy ending..... There was no blood and guts, no foul language no "mature content", so I didn't think it was a big deal.
..
Fast forward a few hour.....Jason and I are sitting in the living room watching TV; the kids had been in bed for a couple of hours. Emma comes down stairs crying, wild eyed, not really awake or answering questions, just scared and crying. I thought maybe she was sleep walking again because she had to go to the bathroom. I helped her back to bed and she woke up and asked me about the man with the bug in his ear. She asked if that could happen to her. I reassured her that we did not have roaches in our house and that God would protect her. I rubbed her back, prayed over her and sang a couple of praise songs. She quieted down and fell back to sleep. About 45 minutes later Emma got up again standing next to her bed, wildly swinging her blankey, hitting her bed "to get rid of the bugs!"
OOPS!! Guess my "appropriate gage" was off. I felt horrible. Maybe not such a good idea to watch "Untold Stories of the ER" with my kids.....Her poor little mind kept focusing on that bug! I learned my lesson! I will not do that again!!!
The next day I could not help but think of how powerful our minds are. Everything we do each day originates in our minds. Sometimes all the things running through our minds keeps us up all night. The Bible tells us "whatever is true, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable- if anything is excellent or praiseworthy- THINK about such things......And the God of peace will be with you." Philippians 4:8, 9
Saturday, May 7, 2011
To forgive or not to forgive.....
This morning I was able to sleep in til 8:30! I could not tell you the last time I slept that late!! However, I woke up to the sound of screaming, bickering children coming from the kitchen. So, I did what any mom would do. I went to investigate......
When I walked into the kitchen Emma was on the floor, Josh was on top of her trying to keep her quiet....there was a serving tray with a bowl of cereal with bananas cut up in it, some toast, and a couple of granola bars. As soon as the kids saw me they began to scream louder! They were upset that I was up and ruined their surprise!!
They were attempting to serve me breakfast in bed for Mother's day and were arguing about what to serve and how to serve it. Josh was trying to keep Emma quiet so they didn't wake us up! Then when they saw that I was up the argument exploded!! So, both kids were in on our bed and we were trying to sort out and diffuse the argument. Emma began to cry and admit that it was Josh's idea. She was sobbing and asking her brother to forgive her for being so loud and ruining their surprise.........Josh responded with a "Humph!" With some prodding from Jason and I he said "It's OK" (said in an Eeyore voice). Josh was very reluctant to forgive his sister.
It struck me that he was so reluctant to forgive his sister. I said, "Josh how would you feel if God was so reluctant to forgive you?" Josh thought about it for a minute and then gave his sister a big hug and accepted her apology......
Later, this afternoon one of Josh's friend came over. They were out in the front yard playing football. I am not sure what happened, but his buddy got mad at him and didn't want to play anymore. I overheard Josh apologize several times. But, his friend never forgave him, instead he got on his bike and rode home......
I could not help but think about how just this morning he was the one who was so reluctant to forgive. Now he was the one seeking forgiveness. I too could relate. I myself have a history of carrying unforgiveness, and also have sought forgiveness that has never come..........Neither place is where I want to be!
The Bible tells us that God is faithful to forgive us our sin, that he removes them as far as the east is from the west. I am so thankful for his forgiveness!! But He also tells us that we must forgive others.
"For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But, if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins." Matthew 6: 14-15
When I walked into the kitchen Emma was on the floor, Josh was on top of her trying to keep her quiet....there was a serving tray with a bowl of cereal with bananas cut up in it, some toast, and a couple of granola bars. As soon as the kids saw me they began to scream louder! They were upset that I was up and ruined their surprise!!
They were attempting to serve me breakfast in bed for Mother's day and were arguing about what to serve and how to serve it. Josh was trying to keep Emma quiet so they didn't wake us up! Then when they saw that I was up the argument exploded!! So, both kids were in on our bed and we were trying to sort out and diffuse the argument. Emma began to cry and admit that it was Josh's idea. She was sobbing and asking her brother to forgive her for being so loud and ruining their surprise.........Josh responded with a "Humph!" With some prodding from Jason and I he said "It's OK" (said in an Eeyore voice). Josh was very reluctant to forgive his sister.
It struck me that he was so reluctant to forgive his sister. I said, "Josh how would you feel if God was so reluctant to forgive you?" Josh thought about it for a minute and then gave his sister a big hug and accepted her apology......
Later, this afternoon one of Josh's friend came over. They were out in the front yard playing football. I am not sure what happened, but his buddy got mad at him and didn't want to play anymore. I overheard Josh apologize several times. But, his friend never forgave him, instead he got on his bike and rode home......
I could not help but think about how just this morning he was the one who was so reluctant to forgive. Now he was the one seeking forgiveness. I too could relate. I myself have a history of carrying unforgiveness, and also have sought forgiveness that has never come..........Neither place is where I want to be!
The Bible tells us that God is faithful to forgive us our sin, that he removes them as far as the east is from the west. I am so thankful for his forgiveness!! But He also tells us that we must forgive others.
"For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But, if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins." Matthew 6: 14-15
Friday, May 6, 2011
Overcoming "Mommy guilt".......
So, Monday after leaving Josh's IEP meeting I was feeling a little defeated and like a failure. Quite frankly throughout this whole process with both of the boys I have been fighting mountains of guilt. I could not tell you how many times the thoughts have run through my head, "If only I had read to them more.....If only I had done so many things differently." I even went as far as to say to my husband, "Maybe we should have another baby and start over! I mean do EVERYTHING right!!! Like read to them EVERY day from the day of conception!!" (On a side note....contrary to a recent rumor NO!!! I am not pregnant)
On Monday morning after Josh's meeting I was walking up the stairs to the church and I was thinking about the rest of the day ahead: the little boys had t-ball practice, Josh was supposed to have his first Little League game, they would need to get all homework and spelling practice done before ball. I needed to do my weekly grocery shopping which includes coupon clipping, and add matching so, I needed to find time to do that. I still had to run to the sporting good store to get Josh baseball pants and socks to match his uniform. Then my thoughts turned to dinner that evening. What was I gonna fix and have them fed before practice at 5p.....and oh yeah, it needs to be healthy and well balanced...anything quick and easy really didn't fit those criteria!
Wow!! How overwhelmed I felt! How could I possibly do it all.....I mean all the things the "experts" say to do to raise happy, healthy, successful kids? Like, reading to them daily, spending time with each of them individually on the homework they are struggling with, make sure they have a well balanced healthy diet, make sure they are not watching too much TV, or playing too many video games....making sure they are getting plenty of exercise, encouraging and allowing them to be involved in extra curricular, and teaching them about God and raising them with morals and the list goes on and on.......then take it all times four!! ( for each of my four children) The feelings of failure again were almost overwhelming!!
Then a scripture came to mind from Luke 10 where Jesus is visiting Mary and Martha. Mary is sitting at the feet of Jesus and Martha is frantically running around the house working all the preparations. Martha was frustrated and overwhelmed and Jesus said to her, "Martha, Martha, you are worried and upset about many things but only one thing is needed. Mary has chosen what is better and it will not be taken away from her."
Jesus was saying to her....you are worrying yourself about so many things but only one thing truly matters....So, I asked myself what that one thing is....then I found Psalm 127..."Unless the LORD builds the house, its builders labor in vain......Sons are a heritage from the LORD, children a reward from him."
I can spend all the time in the world fretting and worrying about getting it all right and probably get little "right". Or I can rely on God,give it all over to Him. Accept His grace and love to cover all my shortcomings and focus on building our home on HIM!
On Monday morning after Josh's meeting I was walking up the stairs to the church and I was thinking about the rest of the day ahead: the little boys had t-ball practice, Josh was supposed to have his first Little League game, they would need to get all homework and spelling practice done before ball. I needed to do my weekly grocery shopping which includes coupon clipping, and add matching so, I needed to find time to do that. I still had to run to the sporting good store to get Josh baseball pants and socks to match his uniform. Then my thoughts turned to dinner that evening. What was I gonna fix and have them fed before practice at 5p.....and oh yeah, it needs to be healthy and well balanced...anything quick and easy really didn't fit those criteria!
Wow!! How overwhelmed I felt! How could I possibly do it all.....I mean all the things the "experts" say to do to raise happy, healthy, successful kids? Like, reading to them daily, spending time with each of them individually on the homework they are struggling with, make sure they have a well balanced healthy diet, make sure they are not watching too much TV, or playing too many video games....making sure they are getting plenty of exercise, encouraging and allowing them to be involved in extra curricular, and teaching them about God and raising them with morals and the list goes on and on.......then take it all times four!! ( for each of my four children) The feelings of failure again were almost overwhelming!!
Then a scripture came to mind from Luke 10 where Jesus is visiting Mary and Martha. Mary is sitting at the feet of Jesus and Martha is frantically running around the house working all the preparations. Martha was frustrated and overwhelmed and Jesus said to her, "Martha, Martha, you are worried and upset about many things but only one thing is needed. Mary has chosen what is better and it will not be taken away from her."
Jesus was saying to her....you are worrying yourself about so many things but only one thing truly matters....So, I asked myself what that one thing is....then I found Psalm 127..."Unless the LORD builds the house, its builders labor in vain......Sons are a heritage from the LORD, children a reward from him."
I can spend all the time in the world fretting and worrying about getting it all right and probably get little "right". Or I can rely on God,give it all over to Him. Accept His grace and love to cover all my shortcomings and focus on building our home on HIM!
Monday, May 2, 2011
Update on Joshua......
Today was the day we had our evaluation meeting for Joshua's case study.....this was the meeting in which we were to find out if he did in fact have a learning disability and if he qualified for special education services.
I must first admit that thanks to a friend's recommendation we actually met with the school psychologist on Friday to hear what the IQ testing revealed. I was so thankful the psychologist was willing to take extra time with us. It was much less intimidating to get that information in a more intimate setting and, have time to process the information prior to sitting in another conference room full of educational professionals.
In order to identify the problem they do multi level IQ testing. They test Verbal IQ, Nonverbal, Memory, Visual and so on.....then when they look at all the different scores hopefully they can identify the weakness. So, Joshua scored very well in many of the categories with the exception of visual processing. Because he scored so much lower in that category they call it a "relative weakness". Relative, meaning relative to him and how he scored in all the other categories; it was easy to see his weakness. This means that he sees things the same way we do, it just takes his brain longer to decode it. Hence the slow reading and difficulty with fluency. Josh did test really high in comprehension. So, even though it takes him longer to read it, he does understand it.
Today's meeting was to write his IEP, or Individual Education Plan. Based on the findings of the case study, now they were recommending that Josh is eligible for Special Education services. I must say I was really fighting some denial. I know much of what the testing revealed was not a surprise and made so much sense to me. However, to fully accept that my child has a "disability" is hard!! It is like I understood what they were saying but, still not fully accepting that there is a true defect in his brain. We talked about setting goals for him, one of which was to be reading 90 words per min by the end of first semester next year. That is second grade reading level. He will be in fourth grade. I shared concern with them and they said "we must be realistic in setting goals. If the kids were running a race and one had a broken leg we would make special accommodations for that child. That is what we are doing for Josh." whoa!! I am still struggling with completely accepting it.
One of my main concerns was Josh's reaction to this. What to tell him and how he would respond to the new plan. He will stay in his regular classroom for core instruction. He will go to the Resource room (Special Education services) for more intense reading instruction and will be able to get one on one help with reading assignments, be able to read them aloud to someone, and will also be able to take his tests in there and have extended test time. The main goal is to modify his workload, work through his strengths, focus on fluency, and work on helping him succeed overall and rebuild his confidence.
When I picked him up from school today he asked about the meeting this morning and what the teacher had to say about him. I told him about his strengths and how great he is with comprehension. I also told him we came up with a plan to help him get better grades and improve his reading. When I asked him is he had ever heard about the "Resource room" His eyes lit up and he got very excited. He said, "Yeah, they introduced me to it today. The teacher is really nice!" I told him a little more about it and how he could take test in there and they were gonna help him get his grades up. He says, "I think this is gonna be a good thing! I am Unique cause I have good comprehension, there are some kids who don't have that. I just need help with my fluency."
I cannot express the joy in my heart to see his positive receptive attitude! I could not help but praise God for that and the grace He has given us through this.
Tonight as I reflect on the day I cannot help but think about the scripture God gave me at the beginning of all this, 2 Corinthians 12, where Paul is talking about his "thorn of the flesh". The verse that sticks out to me tonight is:
"My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." (even relative weakness) 2 Corinthians 12: 9
I must first admit that thanks to a friend's recommendation we actually met with the school psychologist on Friday to hear what the IQ testing revealed. I was so thankful the psychologist was willing to take extra time with us. It was much less intimidating to get that information in a more intimate setting and, have time to process the information prior to sitting in another conference room full of educational professionals.
In order to identify the problem they do multi level IQ testing. They test Verbal IQ, Nonverbal, Memory, Visual and so on.....then when they look at all the different scores hopefully they can identify the weakness. So, Joshua scored very well in many of the categories with the exception of visual processing. Because he scored so much lower in that category they call it a "relative weakness". Relative, meaning relative to him and how he scored in all the other categories; it was easy to see his weakness. This means that he sees things the same way we do, it just takes his brain longer to decode it. Hence the slow reading and difficulty with fluency. Josh did test really high in comprehension. So, even though it takes him longer to read it, he does understand it.
Today's meeting was to write his IEP, or Individual Education Plan. Based on the findings of the case study, now they were recommending that Josh is eligible for Special Education services. I must say I was really fighting some denial. I know much of what the testing revealed was not a surprise and made so much sense to me. However, to fully accept that my child has a "disability" is hard!! It is like I understood what they were saying but, still not fully accepting that there is a true defect in his brain. We talked about setting goals for him, one of which was to be reading 90 words per min by the end of first semester next year. That is second grade reading level. He will be in fourth grade. I shared concern with them and they said "we must be realistic in setting goals. If the kids were running a race and one had a broken leg we would make special accommodations for that child. That is what we are doing for Josh." whoa!! I am still struggling with completely accepting it.
One of my main concerns was Josh's reaction to this. What to tell him and how he would respond to the new plan. He will stay in his regular classroom for core instruction. He will go to the Resource room (Special Education services) for more intense reading instruction and will be able to get one on one help with reading assignments, be able to read them aloud to someone, and will also be able to take his tests in there and have extended test time. The main goal is to modify his workload, work through his strengths, focus on fluency, and work on helping him succeed overall and rebuild his confidence.
When I picked him up from school today he asked about the meeting this morning and what the teacher had to say about him. I told him about his strengths and how great he is with comprehension. I also told him we came up with a plan to help him get better grades and improve his reading. When I asked him is he had ever heard about the "Resource room" His eyes lit up and he got very excited. He said, "Yeah, they introduced me to it today. The teacher is really nice!" I told him a little more about it and how he could take test in there and they were gonna help him get his grades up. He says, "I think this is gonna be a good thing! I am Unique cause I have good comprehension, there are some kids who don't have that. I just need help with my fluency."
I cannot express the joy in my heart to see his positive receptive attitude! I could not help but praise God for that and the grace He has given us through this.
Tonight as I reflect on the day I cannot help but think about the scripture God gave me at the beginning of all this, 2 Corinthians 12, where Paul is talking about his "thorn of the flesh". The verse that sticks out to me tonight is:
"My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." (even relative weakness) 2 Corinthians 12: 9
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